Twilight: Redux
by FireFalconDeux
Summary: Born from the insanity of NaNoWriMo, see here one fanfic-writer's attempt to rewrite Stephanie Meyer's "Twilight" in a more twisted, sadistic story of love, murder and a teenage girl's search for the truth. Rated M; AU, OOC, NOT Edward-friendly.
1. Preface

**_=AUTHOR'S NOTE=_**

_Welcome to **Twilight: Redux**._

_This fanfic was born in November during an induced state of insanity which has come to be called 'NaNoWriMo'. As such, it is a rough and choppy little thing, far from polished but deemed good enough to place before the readers and hear their opinions._

_However, please keep this in mind:_

_This is not the Twilight you've come to know and love… or on the other side of the coin, know and hate. Or both, as in my case. It is going to be "au", "ooc" and completely messed up. There may be some similarities between my works and the original story by Stephanie Meyer, but I assure you, they are entirely coincidental. ;D_

_I am rewriting (or have rewrote, depending on when you're reading this) Twilight for my November project. I adored the plot and the ideas, but bless her soul, Meyer's writing did nothing for me. And of course, there were characterizations and events I disliked, ideas I wanted to try out, etcetera. The typical fanfiction stuff, you know how it is._

_I WILL warn you about one difference between this and Meyer's original works: I AM NOT AN EDWARD FAN. **If you expect this fanfic to be Edward friendly, or for Bella and Edward to have some flawless, perfect romance, turn around and go home now.** Real life doesn't work that way, and neither will this fanfic. You've been warned. ;P_

_I am just a simple fanfic writer, one man among many looking for a good time. Nothing more, nothing less. I do not plan to publish this, claim it as mine, try and get credit for it, yaddayadda. I do not own the Twilight saga, nor any of the characters within. The only thing I own here is my fanfic written in these words-- and I suppose on some philosophical level, that is also debatable. Can anyone truly own an idea? Hm.  
_

_So, philosophy aside, here it is… **Twilight: Redux**. I hope you enjoy the story, both parts changed and parts familiar. I would very much appreciate comments, whether they are in praise or criticism. Just remember to consider your words before hitting 'send'. There is a difference between helpful critiques and being inconsiderate._

_Thank you. Without further ado…_

* * *

PRELUDE

"Trust me."

"How?" I said to the vampire, looking up and focusing the edge of my words directly at that beautiful, deadly creature. "After all of this, how can I trust you?"

He was silent for a time, then spoke quietly, his voice disturbingly gentle despite the coldness behind his words. "Is there any other option? All I can do is tell the truth."

_The truth._ Isn't that what I'd been searching for since this journey had begun? From the moment the word 'vampire' had passed my lips, I had sought the truth, and yet it had always danced just beyond my grasp. And now, as I gazed into this vampire's obsidian-black eyes, I thought I knew how Eve must have felt when presented with that damnable apple.

"Make your choice," he said softly. As if there was actually a choice to make. He'd already made it perfectly clear that there was only one way left out of this mess. "And make it quick."

Was it wrong to be frightened? Having chased this very thing for the better part of a year, was it wrong for me to want to turn around now and run away, as far and as fast as I could? Probably not… A saner person would have done such much sooner than I, which either meant I was brave or insane.

My bet was on the latter.

He held out his hand, offering to me much more than help up from where I sat. "So…?"

I took a breath and lifted my own hand, allowing myself to reach for that sweet, dark promise… as I knew I would.

"I want to know everything."


	2. Chapter One

CHAPTER ONE

The September sky was a beautiful, azure blue, clear of any clouds and the air still a bit too warm from the not-yet-gone summer. I leaned my head against the window of the '75 Ford pick-up, watching the Arizona landscape whirl by as I headed towards my fate. I tried to take it all in; it would be some time before I saw my beloved Phoenix again.

"Are you sure about this?"

I turned my head, offering my mother the most cheerful smile I could possibly muster. "Of course I'm sure. It'll be nice to see Forks again."

My mother didn't look at me as we pulled into the airport, but a quick glance at her expression told me all I needed to know-- she didn't believe me. I couldn't blame her, really. It's not like I'd ever taken a shine to the tiny logging town of Forks, Washington; it lay entirely too close to the ocean for my comfort, and it's spot right at the head of the Olympic Peninsula earned it the top spot of the most cold, rainy and sunless places in the lower states.

It was, to me, the very definition of torture. I hated any sizeable body of water with a passion and, after an accident three years ago, I had quit taking my yearly, summertime trips to visit my father there… even in the middle of August, my right leg would complain about the temperature in a way that only damaged body parts could. Combined with seemingly ceaseless trips to this or that doctor and my mother's own failing health, leaving Arizona had formerly been out of the question.

But now, only a month after my mother had gotten remarried, I had put my foot down and decided to go to Forks of my own free will. Home was no longer the warm, welcome place it once was, though it was still a sad, sorry day that Moss Land had become more inviting than this desert paradise. My mother had managed to see through her post-wedding elation and frequent alcohol-induced fogs long enough to object, throw a fit and finally, in defeat, drive me to the first stop in my escape route.

"Do you want me to come with you?" my mother asked as she pulled up to the drop-off curb, her eyes shifting nervously to look past me at the crowds of people coming in and out of the giant building. She smelled like stale whiskey and her shoulder-length, black hair was tangled; for a moment I wondered if Phil would be able to handle the job of taking care of her, even though I knew he could.

I smiled at her in what I hoped was a reassuring fashion, even as my own heart started to pound in my chest. "It's fine, really. You should go home and rest... I'll call you when I get there, okay?"

"Are you sure that you're sure? It's so cold there, and there's fewer doctors," she insisted, her voice increasingly slightly in pitch as she clenched the steering wheel. "What if something goes wrong?"

"Mom, I have everything I need," I replied, making my tone firmer. It was an understatement, truth be told. I had more than I needed. "And I have all the phone numbers for my doctors, their e-mail addresses and everything in case my new doctor needs to get in touch with them. I'll be okay."

Trying not to cry, my mother finally nodded and reached into the glove box, handing me an envelope. "It's something just in case. If you ever need to come back…"

My throat closed up a bit as I tucked the envelope, and the money inside, into my scuffed up, faded-black duffle bag. I leaned over the torn up seats and gave my mother a huge hug. She twisted her fingers tightly around the wheel when I pulled away, so hard that her knuckles turned white. A stab of guilt went through me as I grabbed my only piece of luggage and forced the door's lock open.

"Thanks, mom. I love you."

"I love you too, sweetie," she mumbled.

And then I was gone, out the door and heading towards the terminal before I could change my mind. I tried to ignore the stinging in my eyes as I heard the junky truck backfire as it drove away. The airport was buzzing with activity, and I very nearly tripped over no less than three people on my way to check in. Biting my lip, I tried to get to my seat at the gate without maiming myself or anyone else, but by the time I sat down I had cause a security guard to spill coffee on himself and had nearly run over a little old lady in my rush to apologize and escape.

I took a deep breath, closed my eyes and sunk down into the plush chair. I tried to block out the noise and focus on my breathing in an attempt to keep myself calm. It was difficult to tune out the screaming children, the yelling and sound of planes thundering overhead; I took my CD player out of my duffle bad, my hand twitching slightly as I slipped on my earphones. As soon as the delicious sounds of Ozzy Osbourne filled my ears, I could feel my muscles start to relax. I stared at a single spot on the ceiling and let myself drown in the music.

It was starting to sink in exactly what I was doing when the plane finally pulled up and I boarded; logic always has the worst timing. I shoved my bag in the compartment above my seat, sitting by the window and staring out at the magnificent sky. Soon, the plane moved and began to rise up into the expanse of blue, the features of the land becoming smaller and smaller as we went higher. I toyed with my silver medical bracelet as I began to relax once more, my mind wandering to Charlie.

Charles Swanson, Chief of the Forks Police Department and my father, had married my mother Rene when they were nineteen. Her health problems and their clashing personality led to their divorce when I was only a few months old. She left Forks to return to Arizona not long after, and the chances to see Charlie had been few and far between up until I was about ten years old. I started to visit him every year from the end of school in June to the start of school in September. He always dragged me to La Push at least once per summer so that he could go fishing; it would have been horrible had I not made friends with a few of the local Natives, including the son of my father's friend, Billy Black. But then the accident happened…

My hand twitched, and I looked away from the window, plucking a National Geographic's magazine from the mesh holder on the seat in front of me. I flipped through the pages idly, skimming. I hadn't seen my father in three years, had barely even spoken to him. I couldn't imagine how he felt, having me come to live with him after all he went through the last time we were together. It was lucky for us both, perhaps, that he was practically married to his work and I was all too busy trying to keep on track in school to really worry about the time we spent together.

Nevertheless, there were definitely going to be some awkward moments, and I didn't want to think about them. Instead, I focused on the gorgeous pictures in the magazine, thinking of my own camera packed away in my bag and daydreaming of the day that I would submit one of my own works and see it published. Eventually I fell asleep, waking a few hours later with a jolt as the plane landed in Seattle. I shuffled off the plane, grabbing my bag and trying not to fall over it when I accidentally dropped it twice.

After grabbing a bite to eat at one of the little Chinese places inside the airport and nearly missing the second half of my flight… a somewhat terrifying ride on a prop job with a suspiciously loud sounding engine… I arrived in the city of Port Angeles. My vision swam a bit as I stepped off the plane, but a strong arm caught me before I had the chance to fall over. I peered up and offered a bright smile to a taller man, streaks of silver in his curly black hair and friendly blue eyes. He smiled back, and I offered my father a hug.

"Well, glad to see you, too," he said gruffly, but there was a hint of laughter in his voice. "Did you have a nice trip?"

"Which one? There were plenty," I teased, following him to his car once my legs felt solid again.

He grinned a bit, taking my bag and stuffing it into the trunk. Naturally, he had driven his police cruiser to pick me up… and would be using the same cruiser to haul me back and forth to school every day. I admired the vehicle before I got into it, but the teenage half of my brain was ready to die from embarrassment at the thought of being carted around in it. I pondered walking to school instead.

"How's Rene?" Charlie asked, starting the car up and easing out towards the road to Forks.

"She's good," I said, forcing a bit of cheer in order to hide the lie. My father would only be depressed if he knew that his ex-wife had become a self-medicating recluse. "She hasn't has a seizure in a while," I added. A little bit of truth for good measure.

Charlie was quiet for a moment. He glanced at me before turning his attention back to the road, eyebrows furrowing a little. "And you?"

I winced. He didn't push the subject, and I was thankful for the following silence. Any time we had talked the last few years, we never talked about the accident, or my health. It was a subject I knew we would have to confront at some point, but the thought of it made me nauseous. Letting out a soft sigh, I looked out the window at the passing scenery. I hated change, and the change from the bare, dry desert to green everywhere I looked was quite a sudden, significant one… But the shift in the physical landscape was still more familiar than the emotional chaos my step-father unwittingly invited into my life, and I found myself growing less resentful and more grateful for this lush, mountainous environment.

Which, of course, didn't change the fact I despised it with every fiber of my being.

The rest of the hour-long ride was mostly filled with uncomfortable pauses, small talk about the weather and school, which would be starting the next day. Charlie had already gotten most of my paperwork filled out; all that was left were the doctor's notes I had brought from home, which were to be dropped off when I picked up my schedule from the office in the morning. Before I knew it, we had reached the main highway through Forks and were approaching Charlie's home. He drove up the familiar road and parked in the drive-way; I got out of the car, grabbed my stuff from the trunk and turned to face my new residence.

It looked exactly the same as the last time I'd seen it. A cement walkway led along the side of the large yard, through a small and depressingly empty flower bed and to the white door with a pretty glass pattern, which looked like it had seen better days-- a piece of cardboard covered a hole in the pattern, and my dad smiled sheepishly at my raised eyebrow.

"I had a bit of an accident with a fishing pole," he said, digging the keys out of his pocket. "Been meaning to fix it…"

I wasn't surprised. Nor was I surprised by the fact that, when we walked into the house, it was just as unchanged as the outside of the house. A glance to the left showed me the same old coat rack and the same red rug at the bottom of the staircase, while a glance to the left revealed the same pictures on the wall… mostly of Charlie fishing. From where I stood I could see almost all the living room with the same old leather furniture, and I could see a bit into the kitchen… which had, apparently, gotten a paint job and what looked to be a new fridge. I took all this in as I walked towards the stairs, setting my bag down and shedding the puffy jacket I'd acquired in Seattle.

"Can you make the stairs?" Charlie asked quietly, taking my shoes as well as his own and setting them in their proper places. "We could switch rooms if you want."

I grabbed my bag and smiled in the most cheerful manner possible. "I can make it. It's not so bad, really."

He nodded at me, then wandered into the living room to turn on the television. I breathed a sigh of relief, happy that he was nothing like my snoopy and persistent mother, and made the trek up the stairs and to my bedroom. The old wood floors didn't squeak as much as I remembered… perhaps another of the sparse improvements… but the rest of the upstairs was the same as the downstairs. Clean, minimalist and comfortably familiar.

Walking into my room, I felt a weight lift off my shoulders. The walls were the same pale blue-grey, the carpet was still the oddly mismatched forest green, and the curtains hanging off the window were still the floor-length, white and lace-like ones from my childhood. My bed was different, a larger one with a dark wood headboard and bedding the same dark green as the carpet. There was also a desk now with a dinosaur of a computer perched on top of it with wires sticking out every which way behind it… it reminded me of some plastic sea monster. Still, I was touched; not only would it help me with homework, but it allowed me to e-mail my mother as I'd promised her I would.

It was thanks to the familiarity and sense of stability that I considered the idea that maybe… just maybe… this whole thing wouldn't be the absolute nightmare I'd first thought. There was hope, and I clung to it as I flopped onto the cushy bed and closed my eyes. A small smile crossed my face; I sat back up and began unpacking before I could fall asleep. There wasn't much in my bag to put away; most of the clothes I'd had were entirely too light for the weather in Forks, the handful of book I'd brought with fit easily into the small nightstand next to my bed, along with my wallet and various medical information, and my camera found a home next to the computer. Within ten minutes, everything was where it should be, save for the bathroom items.

I wandered out of my room and into the bathroom I would have to share with Charlie. Much to my displeasure, the bathroom was the one room my father obviously had a difficult time keeping organized; shaving equipment, shampoo bottles and various other things were scattered about, though to his credit, it looked like an attempt to clean up had been made. A drawer even had my name on it, labeled with a hunk of masking tape and black marker. I laughed to myself, slipping my toothbrush, washcloths and various toiletries into the drawer after I'd turned the shower on to let the water warm up.

Realizing I'd forgotten my towel, I rushed back to my room and plucked it off the bed. It was heavier than it should have been, and I was puzzled for a second before remembering the picture I'd rolled up inside it. I unfolded the towel and brought out the picture of my mother and me, safe and in one piece. My good mood waned entirely too quickly, and I found myself fighting back tears; I was already missing my home. Regardless of the reasons for coming here, this was going to be more difficult than I wanted to admit.

I set the picture on top of my nightstand, hugging my towel to my chest as I grabbed my night wear… also forgotten on my first trip… and went back to the now steam-filled bathroom. The hot water helped ease the slight ache in my leg, and the process of shampooing my hair proved complicated enough to distract me from my depression. After I was convinced that I'd scrubbed away all the airport germs, I turned off the water and stepped out of the shower. I dried myself off and shimmed into my plaid sleeping pants and oversized t-shirt, snagging a comb and getting to work on my hair.

I looked myself over as I detangled my hair, my mind turning to thoughts of my new school and what would be in store for tomorrow. I was most like my father in temperament, but more like my mother in appearance. I had inherited my longer, black hair from both of them, though the slight curl of my locks was an unfortunate gift from my father's side of the family. My skin, slightly less plagued by the typical teen imperfections due to my diligence with cleansing products, was a light cinnamon; this wasn't a tan from the Arizona sun like most people assumed, but the result of a combination between my mother's Greek and my father's Jewish ancestry. My facial features were similar to my father's family, with rounder eyes a little bit of a stronger nose, but from the neck down I was like my mother, taller than average with a large bone structure and baby fat that never quite went away.

It was that last set of features which often caused me the most problems among others my age. I was never slender or dainty like my blonder, fairer-skinned classmates, even though I was in decent enough shape from my years of dancing before the accident and from my regular walks out into the wilderness after. Fit or not, my weight has still been a subject of derision in all my prior school years, and I found myself making my millionth half-hearted and utterly futile promise to myself to watch what I ate. A love of food and of cooking had been programmed into me since the day I could say 'pita bread'.

School was going to be hell, I already knew, and that fact was only highlighted in my mind as I slipped on my medical bracelet. It was a tiny school of less than five hundred people, less people than had been in my old school's entire junior class, and the kids had probably all known one another since they'd been fetuses. I was a strange looking outsider with the social skills of a fruit fly, an abnormality, and being unable to do the things a regular teenager takes for granted wasn't going to help me fit in. If my own mother, the person who knew me best in the world, wasn't even on the same page as me…

I sighed, finishing my hair and spritzing it with leave-in conditioner. Tossing my brush into the drawer, I wandered back to my room and draped the soggy towel over my desk chair. This year, I had to focus and stay on task. I'd nearly failed the first two years after the accident, and had struggled last year; this year was going to be different. As much as I wished that I could be an average student with a gaggle of friends and worry about clothes and parties more than my education, it wasn't possible. I had a glitch in my brain. Nothing was going to change that. I would be happy with just having a smooth, quiet couple of years before I moved on to pursue my dream of professional photography.

My eyes wandered to the picture on my nightstand. In the photo, my mother was smiling, her arm around me as we both leaned against a bright red Mustang. Flopping down onto my bed, I rubbed my knee and picked up the picture, studying it. That me was also smiling, car keys in hand. It was my fourteenth birthday in the picture… and two entirely different people. Memories, and nothing more. I set the picture back down on the stand, face-down this time. I got up, shut my door and turned off the lights before heading back to bed and crawling under the warm covers.

Outside, the wind howled as it wound its way through the trees surrounding the house. Rain wasn't far behind, the clouds that had hung over the entire area since I'd arrived finally opening up and dumping what seemed to be half the ocean onto the town of Forks. The entire trip from Arizona, combined with the dreary weather and exhaustion, unleashed the emotions I'd been holding back. All of it in one day, for me, proved entirely too much to handle.

Pulling my covers over my head, I curled up into a ball and cried.


	3. Chapter Two

CHAPTER TWO

The incessant beeping of my alarm clock told me it was morning and, ready or not, time to get up. One never would've been able to tell just by looking outside-- any trace of morning sun was well hidden by the solid sheet of rain and clouds.

I stared at the red, flashing lights of the clock. I'd been staring at them off and on since I'd fallen into a restless sleep near midnight. My body felt heavy as I sat up and walked to the bathroom; my fingers were twitching, but I ignored it and slowly got dressed and brush my teeth. After about half an hour of attempting to look presentable, I gave up, shrugging on the jeans I wore the day before and an old, dark blue hoodie I'd gotten from my grandmother when she visited Las Vegas for the first time.

Eventually, I'd managed to gather up my wallet, my information for school and make it down the stairs without breaking my neck. When I got to the end of the stairs, I noticed a brand new backpack sitting by the door. Curious, I went over to look; it was black and a dark, maroon red… my favorite color. It was filled with pencils, paper, notebooks… and a little note, folded up inside.

_I love you, Bella. Have a good day._

_- Dad_

Wow. I stared at the note a moment, then tucked it back into the backpack. That was something I planned on saving for as long as possible-- it wasn't every day that my father put forth that sort of emotional effort.

Going into the kitchen, I found Charlie there eating breakfast. "Hey," I greeted, grabbing some cereal and sinking down into the second of the two chairs in the corner.

"Good morning," he replied, looking up from his paper. He smile faded a tiny bit as he saw what was undoubtedly the giant circles under my eyes that I'd haphazardly tried to hide with concealer make-up, the only sort I bothered wearing on a regular basis and a tell-tale sign of my being overly tired. "How are you?"

"A bit shaky," I admitted. "But I'll be okay once I start moving around. Uhm… Do you want me to pay you back for that stuff in the hall? I brought some money with for supplies."

Charlie's smile came back, his expression slightly embarrassed. "No, consider it a gift. I wanted you to feel comfortable your first day."

"Thanks, dad. That's really nice of you."

He nodded, and we fell into out usual silence; he hated being emotional just as much as I did. After we were both finished with breakfast, I left the kitchen and slipped on my jacket, waiting for Charlie by the door. While I waited, I looked over the pictures on the wall. My dad when he first became a cop… him with my mother in the delivery room, the baby version of me in his arms… him holding up a giant salmon with his friend, Billy Black… and a picture of him standing with me at a dance recital, one of the few my mother had actually allowed him to attend. I felt my throat close up, and I quickly looked away.

Charlie was there just then, and though he didn't say anything as he opened the door and we headed to the car, I knew that he'd seen my looking at the picture. I ducked my head; I wanted to avoid discussing that subject for as long as possible, and while I was certain that he wouldn't bring it up without some sort of warning, it was awkward enough to just have it hang in the air between us. To my joy, the entire ride towards to High School was without conversation of any sort, let alone on the 'prohibited topic'.

The High School itself wasn't anything like I'd seen before. As we pulled up a good half an hour early, I puzzled over the odd layout of the building before I realized it was actually several different buildings of varying sizes, almost like a housing complex more than a government establishment. There were oodles of birch trees lining the perimeter of the entire place, a natural boundary-line that was a stark contrast to the metal, barb-wired topped fences around my school back in Phoenix. The homey, reddish brick of the buildings was also different from the traditional plaster and plastic getup…

… I wondered if they had a metal detector.

"Here we are," Charlie announced needlessly as he pulled up to the front of what looked to be the main office. I pulled up the hood on my jacket, more for fear of being seen than fear of getting soaked. "Good luck."

"Thanks," I sighed.

As if, my mind grumbled. It was a quick dash from the cruiser to the office. I opened the door and scurried in, pleased by the unexpected warmth and brightness of the office. No sickly florescent lights, no police guards and of course, no metal detectors… Just a few well-placed, ivory-colored lamps that went nicely with the butterscotch walls and darker brown furniture. Pulling my thoughts away from the interior decorating, I yanked off my hood and walked through the thankfully empty room to the counter.

I bit back a flutter of nervousness as the lady there glanced up at me expectantly. "Uhm… I'm Isabella Swanson. I transferred in from Phoenix, the papers I got in the mail said to come here," I said hazily, hoping that she knew what I was talking about.

The woman didn't even attempt to hide the fact that she was looking me over, sudden, surprised recognition in her green eyes. "You must be Charles' daughter! Sure, I have everything you'll be needing right here… We've been wondering when you'd come back."

While I was tempted to ask who she meant by "we", I resisted; in a town this size and a scandal like that, "we" likely meant everyone in Forks who was old enough to remember my mother's furious departure. I smiled feebly, leaning in closer as she pulled out a small stack of papers and began explaining my schedule, the trimester system and pointing out on a map the best routes to all of my classes. I was grateful as she jotted down some notes, seemingly able to guess that I'd never remember half of what she was telling me.

"And there you go!" the friendly woman concluded, handing me the papers with an accomplished, beaming grin. "Anything else?"

I hesitated a moment before opening my backpack and giving her the medical notes from my Arizona doctors. "There's this. Ch… My dad said he already talked with a couple of my teachers about it, but…"

The red-head accepted the notes and slipped them into a folder without even peeking. "I'll be sure to pass them along," she promised, then handed me a yellow slip. "Have your physical education teacher sign this and bring it back at the end of the day, okay?"

I tried to at least sound upbeat. "Sure thing."

"Welcome to Forks, hun."

Managing to suppress a snort of discontentment, I pulled my hood back up as more students started wandering in and headed for my first class. Fortunately, my coat was nothing outstanding and in the torrential downpour, no one even bothered looking to see if there were any unfamiliar faces. I did my best to not slip on fallen leaves as I shielded my trusty map from the rain, peering at it and eventually just hoping I was going the right way.

Eventually I figured it out and made it to the first building of the day, a vague literature class that sounded like I may have taken it already. Someone held the door open for me, and I said a quick thank you as I entered the room. There weren't many students there yet, so I removed my coat and hung it up on the rack as quickly as possible as to not look suspicious, snagging a chair in the back as far away from everyone else as possible. I kept my head down, becoming very interested in the patterns etched into my desk from previous generations.

"Hi, there."

I looked up at the sudden voice, feeling my nerves start to go again as a medium-height boy took the seat next to mine. A few of the other students, most notably a pair of girls that reminded me all too much of the pale, bleach-blonde cheerleaders from back home, finally noticed that there was an anomaly among their ranks. Naturally, it was those two girls which gave me the same look they'd give a junkyard dog before turning back around to whisper amongst themselves. Apparently, things weren't so different here, after all.

"Hi," I grumbled, turning my attention back to the boy and resisting the urge to strangle him.

The boy was very slight, with longish, slightly oily black hair and silver glasses. He had poor skin and overall looked like the typical nerd, but he had honest, friendly brown eyes and despite his faux pas of drawing attention towards me, I found myself wanting to like him.

"I'm Erin," he said, offering his hand, which I shook. "You must be Isabella."

"Bella," I corrected. "Nice to meet you, Erin."

He seemed pleased. "Bella, got it. My mom is a secretary at the police office and knows your dad, so I heard about you coming a week ago. I just wanted to say that if you need any help, you can ask me."

The bell rang and the teacher stormed in with a scowl, immediately launching into the rules of the class and handing out the course plan. It prevented any further discussion, but I silently thanked Erin in my mind; it had given me something to cling to, knowing there was at least one person who I could possibly befriend. I glanced over the outline of the material the class would be covering and my relief deepened. Most of the reading material on the list were things I'd already covered in my Sophomore year back in Phoenix, save for the Edgar Allen Poe… something I'd devoured on my own when I should have been doing math homework. Despite the grumpy teacher-- who was busy yelling at one of the blonde girls, I noted with smug pleasure-- and my tendency to not be fully awake at this hour of the morning, it was another comfort to know that I'd start my day off with a subject I knew well.

By the end of class, I'd firmly grabbed a hold of that small shred of confidence and hung onto it for dear life as the bell rang and everyone started filing out to the next dose of educational torment. When most of the people were gone, sans Erin and a few others, I got up and went to grab my jacket. The sleeve of my hoodie road up, exposing my medical bracelet; I quickly pulled the sleeve back down as I shrugged my jacket on. Erin wasn't far behind, comparing his schedule to mine and walking with me as if we'd known each other for years.

"I have a question," he asked suddenly as we headed towards my Government class. "Feel free to tell me to mind my own business, of course."

I busied myself with my map. "Yeah?"

"It's just that I saw… uh, your bracelet. I was just wondering…"

Great. I sighed, folding my arms across my chest. "I have epilepsy," I explained. "I'm taking medication for it, but if I get too worked up I could have--"

"A breakthrough seizure," Erin filled in. I stared, and he gave me a nervous grin. "Your hand twitched a bit in class when those girls were talking about you. My older sister has epilepsy-- it gets a bit easy to tell with people after a while."

I didn't know what to say. I'd learned from years of being around others like me that there wasn't much anyone could say. "Oh."

He smiled as we arrived at the building for my Government class. "Don't worry, I won't tell anyone. I know how it is."

"Thank you, Erin. Really."

Erin winked at me, waved and was gone. The tension in my shoulder eased away; as friendly as the boy was, I felt like I'd been holding my breath the entire time. I was going to have to get used to the idea of talking to people after all. I would wait until later before determining if that was a good or bad thing.

Government class was much like English, only the teacher… a younger, energetic male that liked to use sweeping, dramatic hand motions to emphasis his words… was much less grumpy and actually seemed to enjoy bantering with his students. I earned more stares, both during class and on my way to my next class, Geometry with one Mister Ermine. He resembled his name-- small, beady black eyes, a nose that seemed to twitch every five seconds and a horrible disposition. He forced everyone who came in to stand at the front of the room and wait until he called class to order. We were forced to introduce ourselves before he barked out where to sit; the list was alphabetical, which meant I had time to try and calm myself down before he called my name.

When I was called, I quickly stammered my name and that I liked hiking before hurrying to my seat, nearly tripping over the next girl on the way there. Said girl was a tall, willowy red-head named Angela who smiled at me as she came to take the seat to my right a few moments later. We barely said hello, both of us still blushing from our turn at the metaphorical chopping block. At the end of class, Angela shyly offered to walk me to my next class and introduce me to one of her friends. I agreed and followed silently at her side, hiding a bit behind her in a vain attempt to avoid more stares from strangers.

My next class was Spanish. I had taken German at my other school, but since it wasn't offered here in Forks, I had to make do. As we approached the building, a small, wiry girl that looked like a shorter, darker-haired and outgoing version of Angela was waiting outside; she waved wildly at us. As we got closer she stopped, staring a bit before almost jogging over with wide, bright green eyes.

"Oh my god, you're the Chief's daughter!" she breathed. "It's so cool that you lived in Arizona. Was it warm? Do you miss it? How's Forks? I heard your mom ran off with an Italian, is that true?"

Angela gave me an apologetic smile. "Jessica…"

The girl, apparently named Jessica, stopped asking questions long enough to see the look on my face and recognize it as discomfort. "Oh! Oh geeze, sorry. I'm Jessica. …Nice tan."

"My mother's family is Greek," I muttered as Angela left me in the care of her hyperactive friend. I could feel a massive headache coming on.

We took our seats in Spanish, and for the next hour I tried my best to answer Jessica's endless questions. Yes, Phoenix was warm. Yes, I missed it dearly. Forks was the bane of my existence, and my mother's new husband was very, very American. By the time class had ended, I'd managed to tune the girl out completely; she'd apparently asked me everything she could think of and was now babbling about all the hot boys in the school and which ones she think I'd be good with on our way to the cafeteria. I stared straight ahead, taking in slow, deep breaths and trying not to panic at the sight of hundreds of students crammed into what my mind saw as a very tiny space.

"Hey, you okay?" Jessica asked, putting a hand on my shoulder as I felt my legs get a bit wobbly. "I'd have thought you'd be used to a lot of people, being from Phoenix."

"I ate outside," I sighed. "By myself."

She seemed to grasp the meaning of such a thing. "Ohh, you were one of _those _people. We don't have many loners here, just follow me and you'll be fine. We have our own unofficial table…"

Jessica kindly led me through the maze of tables to the lunch line, pointing out which foods were edible and which should be avoided at all costs. I grabbed a plain salad and an orange juice… my sad attempt at trying to fulfill my promise to eat better, which I ruined by adding a big glop of lukewarm ranch dressing to the sickly, wilted lettuce. I added some mushy olives and tomatoes in an attempt to balance things out, then followed a patiently waiting Jessica to this 'unofficial table' she'd mentioned.

I felt myself blushing again as she introduced me to the handful of other people sitting there. I recognized Angela and Erin, and there was a blond, athletic-looking boy there from my English class who looked vaguely familiar. I tried to remember everyone else's names, but I knew that unless I wrote them down or had classes with them, it would take a few weeks before I got them memorized. Angela, Eric and the one boy all seemed pleased to see me, most of the others were appropriately reserved, but one of the girls very nearly sneered the minute she heard my name; there was always at least one in a bunch. I tried not to stumble as I squeezed into a seat as far away from Snooty Girl as possible next to Erin. I focused on my salad as Jessica began talking a million miles an hour and explaining her connections to everyone at the table.

Suddenly, I felt a small chill go up my spine. I looked up, glancing around the cafeteria with a growing feeling of unease. My eyes landed on a table in the far corner, and I swiftly looked away when I realized one of the table's occupants was staring directly at me. Despite my embarrassment, I glanced towards the table again.

There were five people sitting there, none of them talking. It seemed that every table surrounding their own was empty, as if an invisible barrier blocked others from coming within a ten foot radius. The second thing I noticed was that none of them were talking; there were three males and two females, and all were outwardly pre-occupied with other things. Finally, I took in their general appearance. All were dressed in dark, muted colors and in a style that seemed a little bit too casual, even for Forks… plain and very unassuming. But _they_…

They were anything but plain.

The first of the males was massive, likely taller than my own father, with dark, curly hair and arms that looked like the man could snap the table he sat at in half. The one sitting next to him seemed smaller and slighter, less intimidating with his ratty camo jacket and tidy, trimmed blond hair; his demure appearance was betrayed by the powerful-looking muscles that moved under his skin as he spun his unopened milk carton around like a top. Unlike the other two, the last male looked youthful and somehow a bit less mature, his bronze-colored hair untidy and looking like he'd not bothered to comb it. He was a bit taller than the blond but thinner, and less buff. The females were equally daunting in appearance, the first being a tiny, almost elfin looking creature with short, spiked hair. The second female and the last of the five looked like she'd stepped from a magazine despite her plain clothing-- tall and lean with impressive curves and long, golden hair that far outshone the bottle blondes in the surrounding tables.

Although they were all different, they did share several key qualities… All looked like they could easily bust your face if you pissed them off. All of them shared a skin tone that could almost be described as translucent. All of them sported dark eyes with bags under them, as if they all were suffering from insomnia, and they were all impossibly, incomparably beautiful.

I couldn't look away. There was something about them, about the way they looked, that reminded me of the exquisite, timeless and pale marble statues my grandmother kept of the Greek gods. And it was the last of the males, the youngest-looking one, which had been staring at me. My eyes went back to him; his back was towards me once again, and I felt a ridiculous stab of remorse at not being able to catch a glimpse of his face again.

"Ah, so you've spotted the Cullens."

Snapping out of my trance, I turned back to see Jessica looking at me with a slight scowl on her face. "Sorry," I stammered. "I… Who are they?"

Jessica flipped her hair, glaring over my shoulder towards the five with open contempt. "They're the kids of Doctor Cullen, the newest guy at our hospital. Well, adopted kids. Jasper and Rosalie Hale are the blonds… I guess they're related to the Doctor's wife. Emmett is the big guy, then there's Alice… and Edward," she very nearly sneered the last one's name.

I struggled for words as I glanced back at their table. "They're… gorgeous."

She shrugged. "They're weird. They've been here for two years and haven't talked to anyone… the Doctor is nice enough, but still. And besides," Jessica lowered her voice in a gossipy fashion, "they _date _each other. Alice and Jasper go out, and so do Emmett and Rosalie. How creepy is that, yanno what I mean?"

"How do you know that?"

"My mom's friend knows someone who's a nurse at the hospital, of course."

Of course, I thought with dark amusement. I reminded myself to never trust anything Jessica had to say on other people. "What about Edward?" I asked, thankful that my darker skin tone would at least help hide the fact that I was blushing. Jessica and Angela exchanged glances, and I felt myself go from being embarrassed to curious.

"Edward doesn't date," one of the other girls said quietly. "And we don't bother asking."

Suddenly, Jessica brought up a dance that was apparently coming up on Halloween, and the subject thus was switched. I didn't attempt to bring it back to the mysterious, strange teenagers; it, like many things between my father and I, was a forbidden subject here at this table. That much was clear. But why…? I found myself allowing my eyes to wander back towards the table where the five sat… And I froze as my eyes met the coal-black depths of Edward Cullen. For the first time that day, a set of eyes didn't look at me with interest. No, these eyes looked at me with something entirely different.

Hatred.

The bell rang and I jumped in my seat, almost falling off the chair as I turned away and grabbed at my backpack. Angela, who shared Biology II with me, waited until I detangled myself from the table and stumbled to my feet. My heart was bounding wildly in my head, and I stopped for a moment to take a few slow, deep breaths. I couldn't seem to think and walk at the same time… and I was too busy thinking about those eyes, and the emotion within them. Angela, happily, didn't ask-- I wasn't forced to explain the unexplainable terror that boy's gaze had caused. Sure, staring was rude, but still…

Finally, I was able to walk without falling down, and we headed towards the next class. I focused on Angela and her explanation of the biology class, the teacher, and what I'd have to do to get out of dissection labs. We neared the classroom and she paused before adding one last, vital bit of information.

"Edward Cullen is in the class," she said, looking at me as if to drive home the importance of this fact. She didn't say anything else, but I could hear the unspoken attempt to prepare me for something within her words.

"Goodie," I muttered.

Angela either didn't hear or choose not to reply to my lack of enthusiasm, opening the door to the room and going inside. I followed, the happiness of my love for science fading fast in the face of a sudden, gripping sense of panic. I sucked in a breath as I took in the scene before me-- my clumsiness had apparently made us late, and Angela had snagged the second-to-last seat next to the dude from my English class and from the lunch table. I suddenly remembered that his name was Mike-- yet another bit of useless information brought to you by the mind of Isabella Swanson.

There was only one seat left, and I bit my lip as hard as I could as I slinked over to the spot next to the pale, bronze-haired figure. I set myself down on the chair as quietly and carefully as possible, praying to whatever gods would listen that Edward Cullen wouldn't recognize me as the staring girl from lunch. While the teacher took his spot at the front of the class, I did my best to keep my eyes forward and not tempt fate by peeking at my classmate. But the faint sound of metal against linoleum caught my attention, and on my way back from getting the class textbook, I noticed that he has moved as far away from my seat as possible without completely leaving the table.

What the hell was his problem? I felt a flicker of irritation rise inside my mind. For a brief, cynical moment, I wondered if I had forgotten deodorant that morning. But no, my personal hygiene wasn't the issue. I wished it was that simple, especially when Edward came back from getting his own textbook, our eyes briefly meeting; his face twisted into what was almost a sneer. Perhaps, like the girls in my English class and the girl at the lunch table, he had simply found something about me to dislike…

I closed my eyes, focusing on my breathing and to the teachers droning voice; my panic began to fade, replaced more and more by curiosity. No, the way he looked at me was different than the others; it was something else, something more than the petty snobbery of my typical High School experiences. I had committed some sort of trespass, though I didn't know what I possibly could have done to offend him enough to glare at me in such a fashion. Regardless, there was nothing I could do about it while I sat in Biology II-- I wouldn't think about the boy who set next to me, those eyes… and the fact that maybe Jessica, despite her questionable sources, might be right.

There was something not quite right. A puzzle. I didn't know what, and I didn't know how on earth I would find out, but one way or another, I had to know more about Edward Cullen. There was one thing I knew for sure-- this year was going to be more interesting than I'd thought.


	4. Chapter Three

CHAPTER THREE

I stared off into space for the rest of the class, contemplating all the excuses I could make to get out of having to cut up frogs; the thought of dealing with amphibian guts was more than enough to distract me from just about anything. The whole affair dragged on much longer than the classes, and whether it was because the end of the day was drawing closer or because I was sitting next to one of the most beautiful and apparently most hostile people in all of Forks, I didn't know. Finally the bell rang, and my ill-tempered companion rose from his seat and was out the door before anyone else could even stand up.

"What was that all about?" Mike asked as he and Angela wandered over, tilting his head a bit towards Edward's empty seat.

I felt like melting into the floor. "Uhm… was something the matter? I didn't notice."

"Cullen was totally trying to make your brain explode with his thoughts or something. I've never seen anything like that."

"Oh," I squirmed inside while we walked out the door and into yet another cloudburst. I pulled my jacket hood up; it was truly starting to double as a way to hide from stares, glares and curious onlookers. "Is he normally so… cranky?"

Mike let out a small snort. "The Cullens stick to the Cullens. The rest of us just ignore them. I'm really starting to wonder about that guy though. Too weird."

I had gym with Mike, as it turned out, and so we waved goodbye to Angela and headed towards the larger building. Mike was the utter opposite of Angela in personality, oddly reminding me of a male version of Jessica. He chattered the entire way to the gym about everything from breakfast cereals to the store his father owned. I tried to participate in the conversation as best as I could, but the best I could offer was my opinion on Frosted Flakes.

He finally took a breath and stopped yammering as we reached the girl's locker room inside the gym, rubbing the back of his head and grinning. "Well, I guess you know about me more than you'd ever like to, huh?"

"It's cool," I replied with a grin of my own. My worries about being friendless this year were completely shattered; Mike was very likeable. "I hate doing all the talking anyhow."

"That Edward," Mike said, a serious looking coming into his eyes, "doesn't know what he's missing. Don't let him bother you, okay? If he does, I'll have to beat the crap out of him."

My spirits were quite suddenly lifted as Mike winked at me and headed off to the boy's locker room. The rest of class went by smoothly and without too much stress, even when I had to turn my yellow slip in to the teacher, have it signed and get stared at by various classmates as I sat on the sidelines while they were forced to do laps; even Mike glanced at me inquisitively. I busied myself with math homework-- the only kind of homework you actually get on the first day-- and decided to be productive instead of wasting my time doodling and daydreaming like usual. When the last bell of the day rang, I tripped down the bleachers and out the door before Mike could find me… I knew there would be questions, and I didn't have the time or inclination to answer them.

I walked to the office, glad that the rain has eased up into a fine mist. As I walked up the steps and into the building, I slammed into a student coming out the door. I apologized rapidly, then froze as a low growl reached my ears. Edward Cullen glared at me from the doorway, and I realized with a stab of panic that the almost animalistic noise was coming from his throat. I shrunk back as far as I could without falling backwards down the stairs.

"S-sorry," I whispered again, my voice trembling.

Without a word, he pushed past me and headed off towards the parking lot. I hurried into the building, surprised that I was actually shaking. My hand

The woman at the counter, the same woman from this morning, smiled at me as she took the slip. "The weather here must be so different than what you're used to," she said, obviously mistaking my terror for being cold. "How was your first day?"

"Fine," I mumbled. "Small classes."

She nodded. "Which reminds me… You can't switch classes unless you fill out a form. Some students," her eyes flickered briefly to the door, "try to get around it by sweet-talking us, but rules are the rules."

I was stunned. "Edward Cullen tried to switch classes?"

"Biology II. Don't tell me you want to switch, too? Like I told him, there really isn't any other option for that period. Other classes are full."

I shook my head, exchanged a few more pleasantries and then left to wait for my father. It was impossible that Edward Cullen would be switching class to avoid me, yet it was the first thing that immediately came to mind. I sat on the bench by the office, resting my cheek in one hand and drumming my fingers on the cement with the other. Perhaps it wasn't me after all, I thought as I saw my father's cruiser in the distance. I would have to ask Charlie if he'd ever had issues with the Cullens; maybe Edward knew of my father and had gotten in trouble before. That would explain why no one wanted to talk about them…

I scrambled into Charlie's car the moment he pulled up, hoping to get out of there as fast and with as few people seeing me as possible. I leaned back against the seat with a sigh, buckling my seat-belt and rubbing my eyes.

"Long day?" Charlie asked, pulling out of the parking lot and heading towards the house.

"Something like that," I sighed. I paused a moment; I should wait until later to ask, when my father had more time, but I wanted to test the waters a bit. "I have good classes, and some of the students are really nice. But there's one kid who had a downright nasty attitude… he was being completely rude."

Charlie made a small noise. "They were bad, huh? That's strange. I've never had any trouble with most of the kids there. Some of them have had the odd speeding ticket, and there have always been a few kids who weren't the best of people or families from out of town that move here and aren't always model citizens, but most of them come from very respectable, hard working families and are well-behaved."

Well, there went that theory.

"Oh. Maybe Edward was just having a bad day, then."

He glanced at me for a fraction of a second; I could see it out of the corner of my eyes. "Edward Cullen?"

… Or not.

"Yeah, why?" I asked as casually as possible. "Are they one of the out of town families that gives you trouble?"

"Ah, well," Charlie hesitated. "The Cullens moved here two years ago. Their father is a good man and an excellent doctor. There's just a lot of town gossip is all… Edward Cullen hasn't ever been in trouble here. All the same, maybe you're better off sticking to people who are a little more… friendly. I want to see you happy this year."

I looked out the window and into the thick forest surrounding our home. A small chill went up my back, much like the one during lunch. My father said that Edward hadn't gotten into trouble, so what was it that had caused his odd behavior? No, scratch that. Charlie said Edward hadn't caused trouble _here_, in Forks. They'd lived somewhere else two years ago. I knew from personal experience that a family didn't just up and move to a place like this in the middle of the school year. I would have inquired further, but we were pulling up to the house and the look on Charlie's face told me he was lost in his thoughts… not the best time to press for information. I would have to wait.

Grabbing my backpack, I let myself in as Charlie went back to work, heading upstairs to take a shower and finish my math. All I could wonder was what exactly I had gotten myself into.

* * * * *

The next day was better than the first, in many ways.

For the first half of the night, I'd lain awake and tried to ignore the rain outside; how anyone was supposed to sleep with that, I'd never know. Somewhere between one o'clock in the morning when I finally fell asleep and seven o'clock when I woke up, the storming had miraculously ceased. The wind had all but disappeared and the rain was minimal, even though the dark clouds constantly overhead still threatened a deluge at any moment.

I had taken my spot in the back row of English class, and Erin once again sat next to me. Mike, who gave Erin a somewhat apprehensive glance, seemed content to sit in the spot in front of me, eventually twisting around in his seat and complimenting me on my scrawly, illegible handwriting… of all things. He looked pleased when Erin and I both included him in our morning chatter, and I was relieved that Erin was indifferent to Mike's off-the-wall attempts at flirting.

The three of us walked together to my Government class, which was proving to be more interesting than I had suspected, and I somehow avoided getting called on in both Geometry and Spanish class. Jessica walked with me to lunch like yesterday, and patted me on the back when my face drained of color like yesterday; little did she know that it was for an entirely different reason. While I was anxious over having to stand in that crowded line, I was more anxious that Edward Cullen would be in that crowd. It was an utterly irrational fear-- I had done nothing gravely wrong, he was obviously just unsocial and probably was irritated with people staring at him. I could sympathize. And yet…

But Edward Cullen was also why the day was worse than yesterday. I didn't run into him in the line, I didn't manage to trip over him or offend him any further. I didn't have the chance; he wasn't anywhere in sight. There were only four figures at the Cullen's table, all looking vaguely morose. I ate my usual almost-healthy salad in silence, listening to Mike and another boy banter about football and trying my best to follow the conversation if only to have a distraction.

"Hey, Bella?" Angela asked quietly, tugging lightly on my sleeve. "I need to go to Biology early. Can you come with me?"

I leapt at the chance to escape from the buzzing, crowded room. "Sure."

We dumped our trays, said our goodbyes and headed off. Angela nervously brushed back her hair with one hand, and I could feel a strange uneasiness between us. She fidgeted the entire way to the classroom; once we got inside, she set her stuff down and glanced about. We were alone, and I was sure that was the point.

"What's the matter, Angela?"

Angela looked at the floor, sitting down in her seat and folding her hands in her lap. Her knuckles were white. "Can I ask you something?"

I sat in the chair next to her. "Of course."

She bit her lip. "If… if, theoretically, there was something about one of our classmates… If there was a rumor about them, would you want to know? I mean, it's just a rumor of course, but…"

"Is this about Edward Cullen?" I asked, my entire body suddenly going tense. "Angela, if there's something you think I should know, then just tell me."

"Well… The Cullens came here from Alaska two years ago, very suddenly. It was in the middle of the school year and everything. Then this cop from Alaska came down here and worked with your dad for a while… There was this girl, her name was Amelia Lancaster. I guess she hung around with the Cullens. I guess one day the Cullens went out camping and she came along… Emmett Cullen and Rosalie Hale went out hiking, and then they heard screaming and came back. I guess a mountain lion had made it's way into camp, and…" Angela trailed off, wringing her hands.

I tried to swallow; my mouth was too dry. "And?"

"And… when the authorities got to the scene, Amelia was missing. They couldn't find her body and eventually said that she'd been mauled by a mountain lion or fell off a cliff or something. But the weird part was that Edward was missing, and Jasper Hale was, too. Alice Cullen said Edward had been upset and Jasper had taken him somewhere else to calm down. They never did find the mountain lion. They didn't even find paw prints."

"…Oh," I finally managed to say. I wrapped my arms around myself; the room felt colder.

"I don't know what the cop and your dad talked about, but rumor has it that the Alaskan police were investigating Edward Cullen for some reason…"

"They thought he killed her?"

"No one knows, and that's why Mike doesn't like us talking about it. He says it's mean to talk about people behind their backs like that. But you weren't here when the Cullens came, so…That's why people tend to be so jumpy around them," she took a breath and looked up at me with a faint smile. "I'm sure it's nothing. People like to make stories. I bet the cop was just finishing up some paperwork or something. He left a few days later."

I opened my mouth to reply, but just then the teacher came in. "Thanks for letting me know," I said. There were so many questions I wanted to ask, but as the bell rang and students began to file in, I knew I'd have to wait until another time. I went to my seat and grabbed my textbook out of my backpack, my head spinning.

"Hey, Bella!" Mike greeted cheerfully as he bounced through the door. "Guess what?"

He began to prattle on about a trip he was planning to take to La Push on Halloween. I nodded at all the appropriate places, smiled politely and said I would think about going… but I was somewhere else mentally, and I barely heard a word he said. I felt guilty for not being more enthusiastic; I should have been paying attention instead of glancing at the door, wondering if Edward would walk in. Still, Mike looked satisfied as the teacher called the class to order and he took his place next to Angela-- I wondered what exactly I'd agreed to while I was spacing out.

The rest of Biology class was spent reading about cells. Edward Cullen never showed up, and with everyone reading, the silence that fell over the room felt eerie. Mike nearly got in trouble for flirting with the girl at the next table, which he complained about the entire way to gym class; I offered him my sympathy, even if he'd brought it on himself. Once we were inside the gym, I took my place in the bleachers and got out my English homework, a few simple questions on a reading assignment. Everyone else started their warm-ups and eventually the teacher began to explain the rules of volleyball.

I watched for a moment, feeling a glimmer of sadness rise in the back of my mind. The game sounded fun-- I remembered seeing people play it in Phoenix. I wished I could have joined them, but I knew that if I got stressed and hyperventilated, I could have an attack… And that was the last thing I wanted. As much as I wanted to be down there with the others, I wasn't like them and it was for my own good-- as well as for the good of everyone else, as clumsy as I was-- that I stayed out of it instead of risking a seizure.

Although I couldn't play sports, I wasn't without any talent. During the first year or so after my accident, I spent time exploring things I could do; aside from photography and gardening, I had learned that I was a decent cook. My mother at least knew how to cook an egg, but much to my dismay, I had learned that Charlie could barely do that much. Once I was done with English, I brought out a sheet of notebook paper and began to make a list of things needed from the store. Anything to keep my mind busy. It would be nice to fill up the cupboard and fridge with decent food and teach Charlie how to actually make himself something besides microwave dinners…

Mike waved at me as class let out; he was running off with another blond guy and without a doubt it had something to do with football. I waved back, smiling and heading towards the front of the school. Since it still wasn't raining, I took advantage of the 'good' weather and walked slower than normal. I was halfway between the gym and the main building when the four Cullens walked out from the school, crossed my path about four yards away and piled into a flashy, brand-new silver Volvo. I kept walking, though I felt slightly surprised; the only time I'd seen cars like that was when the rich yuppies all got their kids one. Despite the way they dressed, the Cullens obviously had money… not to mention looks. It was curious that they kept to themselves when they could easily have people bowing at their feet.

My mind wandered back to what Angela had said in Biology. Maybe not so curious…

I stopped and glanced over my shoulder. The driver of the Volvo, the smaller female named Alice, was watching me in the car mirror. No, I thought to myself with scorn, she wasn't watching me. It didn't make sense. Even so, I couldn't resist the shiver that ran through my body. I turned back around and walked a bit faster.


	5. Chapter Four

CHAPTER FOUR

By the time that my dad and I came home, I was more than a little exasperated… but at least Charlie finally had an idea of what counted as actual 'food'. We had gone shopping at the local store and purchased a good, double-digit money's worth of bread, fruit and vegetables and a bit of lean beef. I had also snagged a few bags of dried beans and a pint of ice cream… which my father pretended not to see, the good man that he was, and I hid it in the far back of the freezer the moment he wasn't looking. Just because he pretended not to see it didn't mean he wouldn't try and eat it. Hopefully he was too lazy or tired to bother digging.

I went upstairs to take a shower as Charlie left again, relaxing happily into the boiling hot water and not coming out until it started to go cold. I slipped on my nightly uniform of pajama bottoms and t-shirt, wandering into my bedroom and turning on the computer. My math homework required more know-how than I had on my own; hopefully the internet would give me access to people smarter than myself. The tower whirred and made a clunk noise… for a moment, I worried that it would implode or set itself on fire. Finally the screen lit up and the system booted.

Sinking into the wooden writing chair, I finally managed to access the internet after a brief battle with an expired anti-virus program and a swarm of pop-up ads. My first stop was my e-mail account; the promise I'd made to my mother chose to re-emerge from my memory, and I cursed to myself when I noticed at least thirty messages in my inbox. Luckily, they weren't all from my mother-- a good chunk of it had titles imploring me to try this or that product, call this or that number to claim my million-dollar lottery winnings, become a lean muscle goddess in thirty days… and a few newsletters from my mother's church, which I deleted along with the spam. I ignored the twinge of guilt and focused on the remaining handful of messages, the majority of them sent today and within the last few hours.

The first was long and rambling. My mother talked about how she was getting used to the internet and how the at-home work was coming along. She was getting ready to move around with Phil, was excited and missed me, followed by her typical, motherly worrying streak. Said streak continued into the next message and the next, each message getting more and more irritable until the last one threatened a phone call to my father unless I replied soon. I sighed, hitting reply and typing as quickly as I could.

_Dear mom,_

_Sorry I didn't reply sooner. I forgot. You know how that is, though. School has been okay, nothing really interesting has happened. There's a cute boy in two of my classes and he flirts with me, but he flirts with all the girls so I wouldn't get your hopes up of having grandkids anytime soon. I made a few other friends, and I'm actually happy here. Please say hello to Phil for me, and try to not panic if I don't reply to your messages right away, okay? _

_Love you,_

_Bella_

I moved on to the last message, one from my therapist back in Phoenix. She was wondering how I was doing, and wanted to know if checking in with her one per month over the internet would be good for me. My fingers hovered over the keys as contemplated what I had written to my mother in the previous message. Although I had told my mother nothing interesting had happened and that I was happy, it wasn't quite the truth… and though I knew my therapist wouldn't say anything to my mother, I hesitated a moment before I started typing out my reply.

_Dear Nora,_

_I can call you once per month, sure. Everything is… interesting. I told my mother that I was happy, but I'm not really. I miss Arizona. The cold here is starting to get to my knee a little. I feel bad for making Charlie drive me around. I wish I didn't have this stupid epilepsy. I've been having twitches in the morning, I hope my medication isn't acting up. I always worry about that. I worry about everything, but you know that. Like there's the boy in my class, he just glared at me like I was the devil on the first day of school, tried to change classes and everything. My new friend Angela said he might have gotten in trouble back where he came from, and I… Well, it creeps me out a bit, but he is very attractive._

I scowled, and deleted the last line.

_Well, it creeps me out a bit. I'm sure it's just a rumor though. Anyhow, that's life in Forks. I'm bored out of my mind otherwise, but at least I brought books. Also, I'm teaching Charlie to cook. Wish me luck. I hope you're doing well, and thanks for messaging me._

_Take care,_

_Bella_

With a sigh, I hit send and looked at the clock. Charlie would be home soon, and I hadn't bothered making anything for dinner yet. I stood up, stretched and headed downstairs to the kitchen. I grabbed a phonebook and found the nearest pizza place, called and ordered a delivery. Rather than go back upstairs and focus on math, I grabbed my Government reading assignment and flopped on the couch in the living room. By the time I was finished, Charlie had come home and the pizza was likely not far behind.

"Hey, Isabella," Charlie greeted as he walked in, shrugging off his jacket and holster; he slipped the gun into its usual spot, the top of a bookcase near the television set. "Doing homework?"

"I'm almost finished," I replied, setting down my Spanish homework and ignoring his use of my full name. "Did you have a good day at work?"

Charlie wandered into the living room and sat next to me, flicking on the television. "It was a slow day. There were just a few speeding tickets and someone's pet chickens got loose on the other side of town. How did school go?"

I didn't answer immediately, watching the television screen for a few seconds. "Uhm… well. It was certainly something."

"Oh?"

"There's this girl in my Biology class, Angela," I started. Would it be wise to bring up the Cullens again? Likely not, but the curiosity stirred by this entire affair would never leave me alone unless I figured it all out. "She and I had a talk today before class. Does the name Amelia Lancaster sound familiar to you?"

My father fell silent. "Yes, that name does ring a bell," he finally answered. "But I'm surprised Angela Weber of all people would be the one to bring that incident up. She's not the gossipy type."

"What incident?"

"The Cullens went out to hunt out of season, and Edward Cullen brought his girlfriend along. She was alone with them at the camp and a mountain lion attacked her. They tried to fight it off but it was too late. That's it. The officials couldn't find the animal so the town's people started some sort of outlandish rumor that Edward Cullen was hiding something, and they moved here to get away from that sort of talk."

I looked at my hands, twiddling my thumbs as I digested the new information. "I thought someone said a cop came here from Alaska…"

Charlie looked baffled. "No cop ever came here from Alaska. Something did come in the mail about some investigator coming down to talk to the Cullens, but no one ever showed and paperwork came in later about them being fined for the illegal hunting. It was never brought up after that, and the Cullens have been on their best behavior… hunting season or no."

There came a knock at the door, and I hopped up and ran to get it. I opened the door, accepted the pizza from the delivery guy and paid him a sizeable tip for the insane task of driving to Forks. I rushed the pizza into the kitchen and set it on the counter, getting out a couple plates.

"You ordered pizza?" Charlie said with a hopeful tone, following me into the kitchen and peering at the extra large pepperoni and pineapple pie. "You didn't have to pay for it yourself…"

I dropped a giant slice onto his plate. "It's okay. You've been taking time to haul me to school and stuff, so it's the least I can do. Besides, it gives you one last night of reprieve before I subject you to my cooking."

"May the powers that be help us all," he said from around a mouthful of food.

I threw a piece of crust at my father. I washed both of our dishes after we were done, got my homework from the living room and went back upstairs to wrap up my Spanish and start on my Geometry. I tried to find help online, but the computer froze half-way through the loading of a page and I flicked off the power switch in annoyance. I would have to figure it out myself; I refused to ask poor Charlie for help.

As I worked on the problems, I actually became grateful for the formulas, figures and the repetitive, boring routineness of the subject. Although I wanted to throw the book across the room and never hear the words 'rectangular prism' ever again, it at least kept Edward Cullen and the mystery surrounding his family safely tucked away on the fringes of my thoughts instead of right smack dab in the middle. Once I'd solved the last problem, I went to the bathroom and brushed my teeth, said goodnight to Charlie and headed for bed.

The wind and rain were less noisy than the nights before, and I found myself wondering if I was somehow getting used to the weather already. I closed my eyes, snuggling down into my pillow and relaxing. Edward Cullen slowly crept back into my thoughts, but figures and formulas still danced through my head, keeping him at bay. With a smile on my face, I fell into the first deep, peaceful sleep I'd had in days.

* * * * *

The rest of the week was spent getting to know people's names, getting used to the fact that I was now part of an actual social circle… and getting used to the fact that, like always, some people within that social would rather I not be there. While a good deal of the people in my classes and at Jessica's lunch table were at least civil with me, there were a few that either disliked me for one reason or another, or had gotten in trouble with my father and decided I was easier to hold a grudge against. It was one of those sad facts of life.

By Friday, things were running fairly smooth. I found out that Erin lived down the street from Charlie's house and he had, with my father's blessing, offered to give me rides to school. It was a decent situation for us all-- Charlie didn't have to lug me around, I didn't have to go to school in a police cruiser and Erin had someone to yammer his head off to for a good fifteen minutes every morning. Surprisingly enough, I didn't mind that last bit as much as I thought I would. Only Erin could make chess sound interesting.

English class was as easy as I'd hoped, but was thankfully different enough from the classes back in Phoenix that I wasn't bored. Mike and Erin still did the usual male glare-contest when talking… or at least Mike did. Erin was oblivious to the dominance displays, and even more oblivious to Mike's attempts to flirt with me. I was less oblivious, but chose to ignore it. Luckily, by Friday, Mike's attempts had all but ceased and were focused on Jessica instead. Jessica didn't seem to mind at all, and our walks to the cafeteria were filled with her gushing over the attentions. Apparently, she'd been crushing on Mike since middle school and he was finally showing some sort of interest in her.

And speaking of the cafeteria, I had started to learn the names of everyone who I sat with at lunch, even if they didn't talk to me. And even though I still had to remember to relax and breathe when wandering through the lunchtime crowds, I was getting better at not panicking; as long as I stuck with Jessica or Angela, preferably both, I didn't feel the pressing desire to throw up. At least, not until I glanced over at the Cullen's table and only counter four sitting there… Edward was gone the entire week, neither at lunch nor in Biology class. I was growing used to the fact that the enigmatic boy was absent, yet I kept reflecting on Edward Cullen and our brief interactions. No one had said anything about him since I talked to Angela on Tuesday, but all in all I refused to complain-- it's not like I wanted him there, shooting death glares in my general direction for whom only knows what reasons.

Biology class itself wasn't bad. I managed to get to class early that Wednesday to talk with the teacher about the dissection labs, using the excuse of religious reasons that I didn't even have. Angela seemed proud of me; apparently she was a vegetarian and approved of my squeamishness. Mike didn't understand the big deal and got into an argument with Angela over it, the first and only time I had seen her actually raise her voice above her usual, quiet murmur. I decided to never, ever make her angry.

Mike had decided to visit with me in gym class during volleyball rest breaks. We tossed the ball back and forth a bit, talking about football teams that I had barely even heard of, and about the often hilarious incidents at his father's sporting goods store. He never asked me why I was permanently stuck as an observer instead of being out on the floor with the rest of them, and I was grateful. When he was called back to the game, I would return to my homework until the end of class, wave my farewell to Mike and head out to meet with Erin for my ride home.

On Saturday, Angela called to see if I wanted to go to the library to do research on a biology assignment. Charlie was working and I had finished my homework thanks to the power of the internet, slow as it was, so I agreed. She picked me up an hour later and we made our way to the tiny Forks Public Library. I wasn't terribly surprised at the narrow selection, but it was still a bit of a disappointment. They did have one set of the entire Harry Potter series though, and after getting a library card, I checked them out.

"I wonder if my English teacher will let me rip apart the obscure mythology in Order of the Phoenix for extra credit," I joked, flopping down at one of the library's tables with Angela.

She smiled. "Did you find anything else?"

I shook my head. "I ordered for some Anne Rice novels, and a couple of books on photography. The guy at the counter said it's going to take at least two weeks to come in. Thank Mister Davis for his giant packets on the feeding cycle of the amoeba, I don't know what I'd do without them."

After a bit more pawing around the library, we got to work on our separate assignments. I helped her with the Biology, and she helped me with my Geometry; within a short hour and a half, we were both done with our work, had found all the books we wanted and were driving back to Charlie's house. I made a promise to myself that I would somehow get an excuse to escape Forks for a day and go out in search of an actual bookstore. Maybe I would wait and ask Angela or Erin the next time either of them were heading out of town… They both seemed more interested in reading for pleasure than Jessica or Mike.

"Thanks for the ride," I said to my friend as she pulled up to the curb. The rain had started up again, and I was unfortunately caught without a jacket. "And for the math help."

"No problem. Have a good night."

I shut the door, she drove away and I was once again left to my own devices. I choose to watch some sort of sappy movie on television until Charlie came home; we reheated the pizza that was left and had that for dinner. Despite the returning stormy weather I managed to sleep peacefully, and the next day I felt rested enough to try and clean while Charlie worked. I vacuumed the bottom rooms and mopped the kitchen before I tired out, but after a few hours worth of reading and relaxing in the living room with one of my new books, I managed to prepare a lasagna and get it in the oven. I ran upstairs to take a shower while it cooked, and to check in with my mother via e-mail.

There was only one message from her this time, nothing from my therapist and plenty of spam. There was another newsletter from my mother's church… I sighed, letting it be. Maybe I would read it later. I typed out a reply to my mother, who seemed calmer but was still worried about me; I told her about my new friends, and though I admitted to being a bit homesick due in part to the constant rain, I confirmed that I was, in fact, okay. Once that was done, I was back downstairs to check on dinner.

Charlie came home a while later, eyeing the pan as if there might be something sinister hiding underneath the pile of cheese, noodles and tomato sauce. It seemed that after all these years, he still remembered my mother's sometimes eccentric cooking; I couldn't blame him for being a bit wary. As good as she had been at times, some combinations should just not be put together.

"You were busy today," he noted, turning his attention to the sparkling linoleum floors and giving them an approving look. "Should I get used to this sort of treatment?"

I grinned, grabbing my plate and perching on my chair in the corner. "Don't get your hopes up."

"Thought not. Hey, this is actually good…"

After dinner I washed the dishes, still bursting with pride from the compliments I'd gotten from my father on the cooking. The rest of the night was spent getting a few assignments ahead in Government and Spanish class, followed by a delightful eight hours of uninterrupted sleep. I was moderately cheerful when Erin picked me up Monday morning despite the frigid cold that has set in overnight, actually participating in his usually one-sided conversations, and I gave Mike my phone number in English when he complained about getting a low score on the pop quiz our teacher sprang on us. My good mood was dampened slightly as we stepped outside after class was over; tiny white flakes were falling from the sky and swirling about on the ground.

I stared at the stuff. "Is that… snow?"

"Don't tell me you've never seen snow before," Mike said with alarm.

"No, no. I've seen snow. We used to go to visit my aunt in Santa Fe during ski season when I was little. But… isn't it a little, uh…early?"

Erin shifted his books onto one arm, offering out the other for me to grab a hold of as I gingerly walked across the increasingly slippery ground. "It's been a cold year. Usually we're not getting snow until near the end of the year, but sometimes we'll get some weather front down from Canada or something and we'll get an early snow storm or two before winter officially sets in."

I was grateful for his arm; I could barely walk right when the surface I was walking on had decent traction. "So… this is going to go away?"

Mike let out a grumbling noise, and it was difficult to tell if it was because of the weather or because of Erin. "It had better. I want to go to the beach for Halloween, and if it snows, I swear…"

I got to my Government class in one piece, and though it was still snowing when I made my way to Geometry, I manage to not fall flat on my face then, either. I waved to people I recognized from lunch in the halls, dancing inside at the fact that things were actually looking up… it was something that never would have happened in Phoenix. Edward Cullen was the farthest thing from my mind when I walked into the lunchroom with Jessica and Angela, but I felt a wave of cold rush over me when my eyes looked across the room and counted five people at that secluded table. He was back.

"Bella? Are you okay?"

I looked over at Jessica, feeling the color drain from my face. "Uhm… You know, you two go on ahead. I don't feel so well, I'll just head over to the table."

Mike gave me a concerned glance as he approached the table with his lunch. "Wow. Are you sick? You're shaking."

"I'm just a little queasy is all. It should go away here soon."

"Do you need me to call someone?" Erin asked quietly, an underlying meaning to his words. He thought I was going to have a seizure. "I could take you to the office."

"I swear, I'm okay," I assured him. "I don't know exactly what's up, but it's probably just the weather or something."

While my knee was aching, I knew the weather had nothing to do with it. I had managed to forget all about Edward Cullen, but the minute I saw him, it felt like all something inside me had wanted to run and hide. What was the matter with me? The only time I'd ever felt like that was before a dance recital, or when people tried to get me to ride a roller coaster at theme parks… It felt as if my entire stomach had flipped a few times. I glanced over at the Cullen table, my heart pounding as I looked them over; why did they affect me so strongly?

"Maybe Edward's put a spell on Bella," Jessica suddenly piped up, coming back with Angela from the lunch line.

I blushed. "Jessica!"

"Well, you are always looking at him. But hey, can't really blame you there. Most of the school fawned over him for a while. And seriously, he's staring at you."

My heart moved up into my throat. "What?" I hissed, then glanced back over to where the Cullens sat. Sure enough, Edward was staring at me with a curious expression. The open hostility from before was gone, yet this only caused my heart to flutter more. "Oh, for crying out loud, Jessica. Don't stare back, he might come over here and bite us."

I finally convinced Jessica to not bring Edward up again; it was bad enough for my blood pressure by being in the same room with him without her continually bringing him into our conversation. I shifted the topic towards everyone's favorite foods, which seemed a safe enough topic until my acrobatic stomach started growling; in my panic, I had missed out on getting lunch. Luckily, Angela offered up half of her grilled cheese sandwich and both Mike and Erin contributed some fries to the impromptu Feed the Bella campaign.

"Maybe you need a break from school, new girl," Mike teased. "I'm planning to skip after lunch and go enjoy the weather. Who wants to come with?"

"I'll go," Jessica smiled brightly at Mike, and he returned the smile, obviously smitten. "What about you, Bella?"

"Sounds great, but I think I'll stay," I said. No way was I going to leave school now that Edward was back. I wanted to see if things were still the same as they were before. "I don't think it'd be a good idea for me to skip classes."

Mike grimaced. "Oh, right. Your father's the Chief. He'd probably skin you alive if he caught you."

I grinned. "Actually, he'd probably congratulate me on finally getting a social life. I just don't want to get behind is all… I uh, had some problems with that back in Phoenix."

Jessica patted me on the leg. "It's okay. You can come with us some other time."

The bell rang, and we all headed off our separate ways. Angela had stayed behind, so we walked together to Biology like usual. Each step closer caused my heart to beat faster, and I found myself struggling to find a distraction from the thought of sitting next to Edward for the first time in days. I glanced up at the giant, white clouds, and got rewarded by a raindrop to the eye.

"It's raining. I guess it's too warm for snow."

Angela let out a sigh. "Well, at least until tonight. I hope we don't get freezing rain. My dad is a logger," that last word was said with more than a bit of vitriol, "and I don't want him to get hurt out there. I wish he'd work for the new prison like a lot of the others are doing."

"I'm sure it'll be fine," I replied, even though I had no idea about the fall and winter weather of Forks. I had only visited there in the summer, and even then it seemed like it was too cold. "Today was probably just a fluke."

She looked doubtful, but didn't openly disagree. We got to Biology class before anyone else, like usual, and turned our work in. I sat down at my table, rubbing my hands as my thumb began to twitch. Rather than get worked up again, I grabbed my notebook and began to randomly doodle; I was better with a camera than I was with pen and paper, but at least I could draw something that looked vaguely like a pony. I kept my eyes to my paper as students started coming in, especially as a certain someone sat in the seat next to me.

"Nice cow."

I froze at the smooth, unfamiliar voice. "It's a pony," I muttered, refusing to look up. Refusing to believe that Sir Mysterious was actually talking to me.

Whether or not Edward heard me was questionable, as the teacher called class to order that very moment and it didn't give him a chance to reply. I moved from drawing to taking notes as the teacher lectured about the food chain, as he had yesterday; it was stuff I'm sure I'd covered in science classes before, but seeing as how I had the memory of a fruit fly, I wrote it all down anyhow. As the teacher began talking about the balances in nature and the relationships between predator and prey, I felt eyes on me and glanced over at Edward. I immediately looked away the second it registered that he was, in fact, looking at me. I felt like an idiot-- here I wanted to check and see if maybe I'd been imagining his bad mood that first day or something, and now I couldn't even look at him without wanting to fall over. It was pathetic.

"So for this assignment," the teacher concluded, "I'd like for you to work with your partner and…"

I looked up and stared at the teacher in disbelief. My partner was a guy who looked like he wanted to maim me last week, and now suddenly I was supposed to work with him? I closed my eyes and rubbed the bridge of my nose as the teacher handed out the worksheet. Chill, I though to myself as I opened my eyes again. It was just a few questions on one little chapter. Nothing to get worked up over…

A pale hand reached over and gently plucked the worksheet form my side of the table. "You're Bella Swanson, right?" Edward asked, his pen already scribbling my name on the paper before I could reply.

I stifled a sigh. "The one and only."

"I thought so. I'm Edward--"

"-- Cullen," I cut in, taken aback by the slightly cutting edge to my own tone. "I've heard about you."

He sounded amused. "I'm flattered."

I dared to look directly at him, his smug tone striking an irritated nerve in me. "Don't be. It wasn't all good."

Edward paused in his writing, meeting my gaze. I nearly had a heart attack right then and there; his eyes, not the flat black I'd thought I'd seen the first day of school, were a bright, striking gold.

"And I," he replied with a neutral expression, "wouldn't have it any other way."

I wanted to reply, but I couldn't. I would have been satisfied with simply being able to look away and focus on our work, but I couldn't seem to do that, either. Something in those amber eyes held me, and only when Edward looked away himself did I feel released from that power. I turned my attention to my textbook, and for the rest of the class I busied myself with throwing out short, simple replies to the questions on the worksheet while Edward wrote them down.

We were among the first ones done, and Edward turned in the paper to the teacher. He didn't say anything else to me, and it gave me plenty of time to pull out my copy of MacBeth… my newest English assignment… and get started on the first required reading of the trimester. I was in the middle of Act I when people started getting packed up, and I stood up to get ready to go as well. I avoided looking at Edward, or at least I tried; I accidentally dropped my book while attempting to put it into my backpack, and I suddenly found it being offered back to me before I could even attempt to lean over and get it myself.

I glanced at Edward and gingerly accepted the book from him. "Thanks."

He flashed me the most brilliant, wondrous smile I had ever seen, and I felt as if I was a fish and someone had just shoved an electric cattle prod into my tank. "You're welcome."

I was too stunned to say much else, and I was out the door before the bell could even finish ringing, my heart thumping madly in my chest as I scurried towards gym. I didn't bother waiting for Angela or Mike-- I would have to apologize to them later. I felt very much like the fleeing deer from the Biology lecture today, especially as I walked to gym class and felt those eyes on me all the while.


	6. Chapter Five

CHAPTER FIVE

Contrary to my assertion to Angela that everything would be fine, Mother Nature had decided to prove me wrong. I opened the door to the house and peered out into the icy, foggy morning light with a long, heavy sigh. The freezing rain had covered the entire town in a nice, inch-thick layer of shiny, slippery doom. I shut the door, sighed again and seriously considered going back to bed. Instead, I trudged into the kitchen to make myself some breakfast like usual.

Chewing on a slice of toast, I picked up the phone and called Erin. "Hey, did you look outside?"

The boy sounded abnormally cranky. "Yeah, I saw the mess. I've got my chains on though and I'm still going to school. Want me to pick you up?"

"Yep. See you in a few."

I hung up and finished my breakfast with a shot of orange juice, gathering my things and waiting outside on the steps for Erin to arrive. Once he pulled up, I skidded my way over to his car… only falling on my tush once, I'm proud to say… and threw myself into the passenger seat.

"Are you okay?" Erin asked, as per usual.

"Never been better," I wheezed, rubbing my knee and willing away the stiffness in the achy joint. "Just cracked my spine, nothing I can't handle."

For a moment he looked at me as though I were serious, then apparently caught on to the joke and shook his head as he carefully made his way towards the school. "You and my sister both scare the crap out of me sometimes, I hope you know."

"Welcome to the insanity, Erin."

Insanity wasn't quite a strong enough word for it, as I was starting to believe; ever since yesterday, since speaking to Edward for the first time, it seemed like things had been entirely flipped upside down in my mind. I focused on chatting with Erin about World of Warcraft instead of thinking about getting to school and hopefully seeing Edward again. Maybe Jessica was right about the spell thing. It was strange, this sudden friendliness, and that smile…

"Bella?"

I snapped out of my thoughts, only to realize that we were at school and Erin was already out of the car. "Oh, sorry. I guess I was spacing out a little," I smiled sheepishly as I undid my seat belt and slowly made my way out onto the ice rink of a parking lot.

He frowned. "Are you sure that fall didn't shake you up?"

"Very sure," I confirmed. Erin grabbed my arm as I started to slide on another patch of ice. "Well, this is at least an interesting experience. I don't think I care much for winter here."

"Ready to go back to Phoenix yet?"

"Hah! You can't get rid of me that easily."

Erin grinned. "Good. You stir things up a bit around here… it's nice."

"Aw, well… Oh, crap," I suddenly cussed, patting myself down. "I dropped my stupid bracelet in your car. Can I borrow your keys a minute?"

"Sure. Do you want me to come back with you?"

"No, just go on to class. You're going to be late otherwise."

Erin glanced at the space between me and the car, then himself and the classroom. He muttered something, then dropped the keys into my hand. "Just be careful."

I smiled. "Of course."

He headed off towards English while I shuffled my way back to the car. After a few minutes of digging around in the center console of the car and along the floor, I found my bracelet. I straightened up, clicking it in place around my wrist and shutting the door. My attention was drawn across the parking lot; Edward Cullen was a few rows down, leaning on his car and staring back at me. I blinked, forcing myself to look away as the bell rang. I locked the car door and began my slow trek back to English class. Maybe if I wasn't too late…

The sound of screeching tires made me instinctively stop and look up. People always talk about things looking like they were in slow motion, their lives flashing before their eyes-- I have no idea where they got those ideas, because all I saw was a van skidding on the ice and coming towards me. I didn't even have time to scream. I was suddenly shoved backwards, the back of my head smacking against the ice. The last thing I saw before the blackness of unconsciousness took me were a pair of golden eyes.

* * * * *

Pain.

I opened my eyes, squinting in the horribly bright light. The light moved away, revealing another set of those amber hues. These were older, kinder… And attached to someone far more talkative than Edward.

"Welcome back, Miss Swanson. It seems you had a rather nasty little fall. Can you hear me?"

"Y… yeah," I said. My voice came out as a slurred mutter; I was so tired that I could barely move my lips. "What…"

"Don't try to talk, it's okay. I'm Doctor Cullen, and you're in the hospital. Tyler Crowly was trying to hurry and lost control of his vehicle. It nearly hit you, but you did fall on the ice and smack your head pretty good. You had a seizure, and you've been out for quite some time."

Cullen… Edward's father. I struggled to open my eyes, my memory coming back to me. "Edward. Is Edward okay?"

Doctor Cullen, sitting on the edge of my bed, was just as beautiful as the others… and gave me the same chill up my spine. He looked down at the clipboard, tinkering with the papers there. "Edward? Why do you ask?"

"He was there. He saved me."

The young looking man paused, then glanced at the giant, plastic clock up on the ivory white hospital wall. "I should go let your father know that you're awake. Try to rest some more."

Screw that, I thought with a low growl. I wiggled my twitching fingers, getting some feeling into them before I grabbed the cold, metal bars along the sides of my bed and forced myself into a sitting position. My vision swam for a moment, but eventually things became clearer and the usual nausea faded slightly. I looked at the clock myself; it was almost ten o'clock at night. I'd been blacked out for over twelve hours. I rubbed my right leg, pain shooting from the knee and up into my hip. Whatever had happened, it had left me with the worst arm spasms I'd had in months, a sore leg and a major headache.

But what had actually happened? I fought through the mental fog and tried to recall that morning. Erin had driven me to school… I had gone back for my medical bracelet. And Edward had been there, I was certain. I had seen him. But even so… He'd been rows over. There was no way he could have pushed me out of the way of that van, and even if he could have, he himself would have been hit. It was impossible, yet I knew what I'd seen. Those eyes were unmistakable, even if I hit my head. Somehow, Edward had gotten across that ice in a matter of seconds and had managed to stop that van from smashing us both. Whatever the reason, Doctor Cullen knew. That much was obvious.

As if summoned by my thoughts, the doctor opened the door and returned with my father. "You're sitting up! That's good," he smiled. I couldn't bring myself to return it, instead eyeing him with every once of suspicion I could muster; someone was going to tell me the truth around here. He blinked, then quickly turned to my father. "She'll be able to go home by now, for sure, we just wanted to keep her for observation. I suggest she stay home at least a couple days and recover."

"Alright, I'll be sure to keep an eye on her and let you know how things go. Thanks, Carlisle."

Charlie, full of fatherly concern, helped me get to my feet and handed me my clothes, politely waited behind the screen for me to get out of the hospital gown someone has dressed me in while sleeping. After dropping everything at least once, I finally managed to get myself decent. Luckily, Charlie had gotten me my slip-on shoes from my room at some point in the night, so I didn't have to battle with laces. He wrapped one arms around me as I teetered out the door and we headed to the front desk to check out. I refused a wheelchair; I would walk out of this place on my own two feet, or not at all.

As we headed towards the door, a figure in the waiting room caught my eye. I glanced at Edward Cullen as we walked by; he was completely unscathed. Our gazes met, but I kept walking. I wouldn't talk to him with my father there, but one of these days I would talk to him and he would tell me exactly what had happened.

"Are you okay?"

I tried to sound positive, but it was hard to sound positive when I also sounded half drunk from tiredness and whatever the hospital had given me for painkillers. "Don't worry, dad. A few more house of sleep and I'll be great."

Charlie didn't reply as he helped me into the cruiser. "You might have to talk to your mother when you get home," he said once he got into the driver's seat. "I called her from the hospital."

"Oh, no," I moaned. "She's going to freak out."

"Well, in her defense, you could have gotten seriously hurt if you hadn't run out of the way in time."

I paused. "Run out of the way in time? Wait, what?"

Charlie looked confused. "Doctor Cullen said you ran and slipped on the ice trying to get out of the way of the kid's van."

"Oh, that," I said lamely. Someone was lying somewhere, for sure. "Yeah, sorry, I'm out of it."

When we got to the house, there were at least two cars parked out front already. Erin, Jessica and Mike were all huddled out on the sidewalk and rushed over when Charlie helped me out of the car.

"Oh, we were so worried!" Jessica gasped as she came over and gave me careful hugs. "Erin was there when it happened and told Mike, and MIke called me and we waited at the hospital but they wouldn't let us in so we came and waited here and… And you're alive!"

"I am alive," I confirmed, giving Jessica hugs back. Erin had seen the accident? If he'd seen it, maybe he saw something. I glanced over at him; it was impossible to tell, with his neutral expression. "I think I'm just going to go to sleep, sorry to disappoint…"

Mike nodded. "We just wanted to make sure you weren't dead."

I smiled wryly. "Thanks."

"We'll call you and come visit tomorrow or something," Erin spoke up, and the other two nodded. "Get some rest."

"Goodnight, guys."

Charlie grabbed my arm to steady me as we went inside. He led me to the sofa, which had been made into a bed. The automan had been pushed close enough for someone to reach, and converted into a make-shift coffee table with a bad of Doritos, soda and the TV remote on it.

"I made you a little spot to rest while you were at the hospital so you didn't have to go upstairs," he mumbled. "They let me off work early when they heard what happened, so…"

My eyes got misty, and I sunk onto the sofa; it was surprisingly comfortable. "Thanks, dad. That's really nice of you."

"I'll go get you the phone so you can call Rene."

Talking to my mother proved just as tiring as anything else. She was practically hysterical, convinced I had been maimed and rendered limbless or some blasted thing. I finally calmed her down to the point where she was actually being reasonable and wasn't demanding my immediate return to Phoenix… despite the fact that she was currently in Florida with Phil. I started talking about how Jessica and the others were waiting for me and promised to visit. She seemed so surprised at the fact that I'd already made friends-- or made friends at all-- that she switched completely into a calmer tone and we chattered a bit about her new place in Florida with Phil instead of my near death experience.

Finally, my mother wrapped up the conversation, satisfied that I was alive and in one piece enough to leave in the hands of my father for a while longer. I set the phone down and flopped back against the pile of pillows my father had placed at the end of the sofa. Charlie came in a few minutes later with TV dinners, and we watched Deal or No Deal while eating. After gorging myself on my macaroni and cheese, root beer and a handful of Doritos, I curled up under the warm, fuzzy blanket and fell asleep.

It was like I was back at the school, on the ground. Edward was crouched over me, the van was right there, about to crush us. His arms suddenly snapped up, and the van smashed into it… yet it was the van which yielded, not Edward. No, his hand went into the metal, stopping the two ton hunk of steel and fiberglass like it was made out of air. The boy looked down at me, his face thoughtful.

"You look too much like her…" he whispered.

And then I opened my eyes, and I was back in my living room. I wiped the cold sweat from my forehead, looking at the clock on the VCR. It was three in the morning… I'd been asleep for only a few hours, yet I felt wide awake. The dream ran through my head over and over, and I wrapped the blanket around me as I began to shiver. It had seemed so real, like a memory rather than a dream…

I stared out into the darkness as my mind began to work its way around that idea. No, it couldn't have been a memory. I'd been passed out or something, or… Had I? The doctor had never seen _when _I'd had the seizure. It could have been ten seconds after I'd hit my head or ten minutes... I didn't remember anything from between the fall onto the ice to waking up in the hospital. At least, I didn't consciously remember. There might have been some point in that timeline where I'd seen something or heard something… Something that didn't quite process itself at the time.

Easing myself off the sofa, I clung to the wall and slowly made my way into the kitchen. I got myself a glass of water, and dug a pen and a piece of paper from the catch-all drawer before returning to my temporary bed. I clicked on the little lamp next to the sofa and, using the back of my TV dinner carton, I began to write a letter.


	7. Chapter Six

CHAPTER SIX

Wednesday was a blur. After writing my letter to Edward, I had fallen back to sleep and dozed off and on all of that day. I only woke up once for any length of time… Naturally, when I smelled food. Charlie came in with a couple of white boxes and an envelope.

"Jessica brought us Chinese food," he chuckled, handing me a box with a large 'B' marked on it and the card. "Apparently she thinks I'm going to starve you."

I opened envelope and read the card.

_Dear Bella,_

_I know how horrible your dad's cooking is, so I brought you guys some actual food. Get better soon! Everyone else is planning to visit soon. Just to warn you, lmao._

_- Jessica_

Fighting back a snicker, I tucked the card back in the envelope and hid it under my pillows. "Something like that, I guess."

I'd fallen asleep after scarfing down the vegetable lo mein and egg foo young, and awoke on Thursday feeling almost as good as I had the day I'd arrived in Forks. My head still pounded when I tried to move too quickly, but my vision was stable and I didn't feel like I'd been drugged anymore. I watched TV for most of the day and true to Jessica's word, everyone else decided to show up randomly throughout the rest of the week.

Mike came over after school, bringing a football helmet from his store and a get well card; I put on the helmet, and he took a picture with his cell phone. We talked about how he was getting better in English, and needed to do better in Biology in order to stay in sports. I suggested he talk to Erin, who was better in pretty much every class than either one of us; he agreed. Angela showed up later that night, a stack of my homework in hand and a smile on her face.

"Nice helmet," she laughed. "I see Mike's been by."

I accepted the homework without protest. "Yep, yesterday. Thanks for getting me my stuff from the office. At least someone is looking out for my academic success."

"No offense, but you need all the help with Geometry that you can get. Do you want me to stay and work on it with you?"

"I think I've got it, thank you for the offer though," I set my homework on the automan. I glanced at the letter I'd written to Edward, the small, yellow envelop tucked under the helmet. "Uhm… Angela, could you do me a favor tomorrow?"

"Sure. What is it?"

I picked up the letter and handed it to her. "Could you uhm… give that to Edward in Biology class? You're the only one I really trust with it."

Angela took it from me, glancing at it briefly before slipping it into her purse. "I'd be honored. I'll get it to him safe and sound."

"Thanks," I said, walking Angela to the door. "For everything, I mean. You're a great friend."

She beamed, waved goodbye and headed towards her car. I went back to the sofa and started to work on four day's worth of who knew what. Friday, Saturday and Sunday morning revolved around that, instant ramen and bad movies on television. I cleaned the living room Sunday afternoon and moved back up to my room, followed by an hour-long shower to scrub away nearly a week's worth of grime. My hair was a disaster, and I had just finished getting it detangled when there was a knock at the door. Charlie had gone back to work, so I hobbled downstairs and peered outside. I opened the door once I saw it was Erin, inviting him in.

He gave me a hug. "You look good."

"Should have seen me a couple hours ago. I could have been a body double for the Creature from the Black Lagoon."

"Bah. Sorry I couldn't get here sooner," he said, handing me a little teddy bear. "I figured the others would have worn you out. I take it you're feeling better?"

I sighed at Erin's question. "Not really," I said honestly. Everyone had been asking the question so much that I was finally willing to accept the fact that everything was not fine. "I mean, better than I was, but in general? I've been sleeping for crap, it's cold, Doctor Cullen's son is an ass and I almost got run over."

Erin walked with me into the living room and flopped with me onto the sofa. "Do you want to talk about it?"

I looked down at the teddy bear, running my thumb over its little plastic nose. "It's just… I used to come and visit Forks all the time. My mom has epilepsy, like me, and when I was younger I didn't really know because she had medication by then. I would come here ever summer, and… Well. My mom bought be a car for my fourteenth birthday. It was an amazing car. Red Mustang. But…"

"…But?"

"It was maybe a month after I got it. I was out by myself… I knew I shouldn't have been, but I was… and I don't know what happened. The next thing I know, I'm waking up in a ditch with my car wrapped around a tree. I guess I'd had a seizure while driving. My leg was broken because the engine got pushed back up into the car, they said I was lucky it didn't take my leg off. I was so afraid of traveling anywhere and so busy with doctors that I pretty much stayed locked up in my room at my mom's house in Phoenix for three years. And then I come back here finally, and almost get squished… I feel like I just want to hide away and never come out."

Erin was quiet for a moment, then shook his head. "You can't do that. That sucks, what happened to you, but you can't give up. I mean, I can't imagine it happening to my sister… she found out when she was twelve, before she drove… But if you were my sister, I would be shoving you out the door and back into society."

I rubbed my eyes, tears stinging at them; there was no way I was going to cry in front of someone else. "I hate society."

"Trust me, so do I. Even so, you have to at least pretend to like it so you can get ahead. I know how hard it is to deal with, but you can't let it stop you from living life."

He was right. I knew he was right. Yet a stubborn voice in the back of my mind told me that he didn't know me, he couldn't know what my life was like and what I was still going through. I wasn't like everyone else… I couldn't just go right back to how things were, I was never going to be the person I was before the crash and life wasn't going to get better just because I wanted it to.

I sighed. "I guess I just need more time."

"Understandable. If it makes you feel any better, Tyler looks like he got mauled by a muskrat, his car is completely totaled and he is planning to beg your forgiveness on Monday by asking you to the homecoming dance."

"Oh god," I groaned. "He's probably worse off than I am, too…" I trailed off a moment, then looked up at Erin and hesitated a moment before continuing. "Jessica said you were there when that happened… Did you see it?"

The grin on Erin's face suddenly vanished. "I saw it. I was there when they loaded you up into the ambulance. Why?"

"Oh… Well, Doctor Cullen said that I'd had a seizure, and I was just wondering if anyone saw it. I mean, I just don't want people to… You know."

"If you did, then it must have been before I got there or in the ambulance. I'd ask Edward Cullen."

My mouth went dry. "Edward? Why?"

Erin glanced at the clock, and I could feel him growing uncomfortable. "He was there with you when everyone else got there, and went into the ambulance with you. Something about having a cell phone and calling your dad."

"Oh…" I shuffled my feet. "I didn't know."

"I hate to be short, but my mom was expecting me back in about ten minutes. I better get going."

We stood up and walked to the door. "Thanks for dropping by, Erin, and for the gift. It's cute."

Erin smiled slightly. "No problem… and Bella?"

"Yeah?"

"Be careful, okay?"

"Always am," I grinned, shutting the door once he was in his car and driving away. I leaned on the door, thoughts racing through my head. I had more pieces to the puzzle now, but I still didn't know where they fit or even what the puzzle was supposed to look like. Hell, maybe there wasn't even a puzzle…

I went back to cleaning, running the dishwasher and finding something edible to make for when Charlie got home. Dinner was a couple cans of chili over a hunk of baked chicken and baking powder biscuits. Charlie didn't seem as suspicious of my food as he was at first, and seemed relieved that I was back on my feet and cooking. A quick peek into the freezer after dinner revealed that we had been running low on TV dinners he'd apparently stocked up on; I was lucky to have recovered when I did. At least my ice cream was still safely tucked where I'd put it. I snagged the entire thing, a spoon and scurried upstairs to finish my homework.

Sleep came earlier than usual, and I passed out around ten o' clock instead of tossing and turning until past midnight. When I woke up Monday morning, the ice was completely melted away and the news people on TV were reporting that the weather would warm up a bit the next few weeks. Of course it would… I'd nearly been crushed, the weather could return to normal now. I shook my head as I gathered my things, skipping breakfast and wobbling my way out the door and over to Erin's car as he pulled up. I was welcomed back to school like I'd risen from the dead or something-- people I barely knew were asking how I was, and I spent most of English class hiding behind Mike, who was more protective than usual.

"Aw, you're like a bipedal German Shepherd," Erin snerked at Mike as the three of us walked to my Government class.

Mike, who had just scared off a couple of freshman girls, gave Erin a dirty look. "I'm just being a good friend. I don't want Bella getting stressed."

Erin peeked around Mike and grinned at me. "Are you paying him for this sort of service?"

"Now you're making me sound like a prostitute," Mike whined.

I blushed and quickly scurried into Government class as they began bickering. I was flattered by Mike's behavior, but I wasn't about to get in between him and Erin when they were acting like crabby old ladies. Little did either of them know that I was already stressed, and a good chunk of it had nothing to do with being mobbed by random, curious students. Lunch was drawing closer and closer with each class; I would have the chance to see Edward for the first time since the incident with Tyler's van, and in Geometry class, Angela confirmed that she had safely given Edward the letter.

Jessica watched me oddly in Spanish class when I stumbled on an easy oral quiz, raising an eyebrow as I slunk back to my seat. "Are you sure that you're feeling better? You look all sweaty."

I gave a nervous laugh. "I'm fine. I just hate quizzes, you know me."

She let me leave it at that, but continued to keep an eye on me as we entered the lunch room. By that point, I wasn't sure who was freaking me out more-- Jessica or Edward. I at least managed to ignore Jessica as we went through the lunch line. I was able to scan the cafeteria without gaining her suspicion, putting on as bored of an expression as possible. Since I only had an orange and a carton of milk, I was the first one back to the table besides Angela and I was free to stare at the Cullen's table without getting grilled. Sure enough, Edward was there…

Mike seemed to pop up out of nowhere a few moments later, though, and I was forced to try and pay attention to his rapid chatter. "Bella! I heard on the news that the weather is going to be great for the next few weeks. We're planning to bump the trip to La Push up a bit in case it gets bad again on Halloween. It'll be perfect, we can have a bonfire and everything. What do you think?"

"Hey!" an unfamiliar voice called just as I was about to speak. One of the older boys from the table next to us came running over, and judging by the scratches all over him and the pitiful look on his face, I guessed that this was Tyler Crowly. "Hey, you're Isabella, right?"

"Bella," I corrected. "Yes, I am. You're Tyler, right? Listen, about last week, I--"

"Yeah, I am SO sorry. I was so stupid for trying to rush like that, and I was beating myself up over it all week. Stupid, stupid."

I flailed mentally as he began to smack himself on the head with his binder. "But I'm f--"

"I'm wondering if I can make it up to you. Do you want to go out some time?"

"Uhm…" I glanced at everyone else. The rest of the people who sat at my table had magically seemed to appear while the one-sided conversation had taken place, and all eyes were on me. Lauren, the blond girl who had glared at me since day one, looked positively homicidal. "Tyler, that's really nice of you, but your apology was enough. Really."

The tension in the air seemed to diffuse, even though Lauren still looked fit to kill, especially as lunch ended and Tyler… obviously not understanding the concept of 'enough'… decided to carry my Biology book for me to class. Mike looked positively rabid as I walked into class with Tyler following along behind me; apparently my attempt at hiding my annoyance had failed.

"Hey, Tyler, I have to talk to you…"

Tyler blinked as Mike grabbed him by the arm and led him out into the hall, the door clicking shut almost ominously behind them. I sighed in relief, sitting down at the table… and noticing Edward for the first time since I'd entered the classroom.

"Hello, Edward," I greeted quietly, arranging my finished homework neatly on top of my textbook.

He glanced at me for only a moment, nodded, and then went back to staring at the chalkboard. I didn't say a word to him for the rest of class, my heart pounding loud enough in my chest that I worried about my voice wavering; I'd made my move, and now it was his turn. I would practice self control and wait until he decided to tell me what I wanted to know. At least, that was the plan.

As the days went by, it was turning out to be a long wait indeed. The week passed slowly, the excitement from the incident with Tyler fading away as people moved on to newer gossip, specifically who was asking who to the homecoming dance at the end of October. Lauren, currently being pursued by Tyler thank in part to a little guy talk from Mike, was in a much better mood and happily playing matchmaker to everyone else at the table. Sans myself, of course; for some reason she still disliked me, and the feeling was fairly mutual. I resigned myself to listening to everyone else talk about the dance, having disavowed myself from the activity, keeping an eye on the Cullen table when the others weren't paying attention.

Edward was as silent on Tuesday as he was the day before, and he was the same on Wednesday, Thursday and Friday. I did my best to ignore him, immersing myself in my classes during school and busying myself with teaching Charlie how to cook after school. Even so, I still found myself peeking in his direction during lunch, and I couldn't get that dream I'd had of him out of my head. Edward Cullen had made himself a part of my daily life, whether or not he realized it… and whether or not I wanted it. He had saved my life and my inner romanticist, that little part of me that was the incurable dreamer, had cast him into the light of a hero. I was finding myself, without a doubt, hopelessly and pathetically crushing on him.

The first of October came and went on Saturday, and it seemed that the new month brought with it the start of a much larger change. I was home alone and doing my Sunday 'cleansing ritual' of vacuuming and mopping when the phone rang. For a moment I considered not answering it, paranoia stinging the back of my mind, but I scooped it up at the last minute.

"Hello?"

Jessica squealed on the other end of the line. "Ooh, you ARE home. I wanted to talk to you about the dance."

I sunk into one of the kitchen chairs, looking at the sky out the window. "I can spare a few minutes, I guess. What did you want to talk about?"

"You've been sort of quiet at lunch when we talk about stuff, but you never said if you're going or not. Do you think you will?"

The thought of all those strobe lights made me wince. "No, I'm not going. Dances really aren't my thing," I replied. I was thankful that no one had, to my knowledge, seen my seizure at school… No one besides Edward, perhaps. I suddenly went from grateful to moody as the gold-eyed boy invaded my thoughts. "I think I'm going to go up to Seattle with Angela that day. She's not going unless she gets asked out."

"I heard. You and you bookworms, I swear. Erin said he isn't going, either. You don't have to bring a date, you know."

"Yeah, I know. It doesn't have much to do with dates, you know how I am with big groups of people."

She sighed. "Yeah… Speaking of dates," Jessica suddenly switched topics. "You… well, you don't mind if I ask Mike to the dance, do you?"

"Why would it?" I asked, her hesitant tone taking me by surprise.

"Well, it's just that you two seem really close sometimes… Yanno? I wish I could get him to fall over my feet the same way he does with you."

I made a mental note to talk with Mike the next day. "Oh come on, Jessica. Mike and I are friends only; he really likes you a lot. You've been yammering about one another for the last three weeks, just ask him out already."

She didn't respond for a second, then spoke again, more thoughtfully. "You've been paying a lot of attention to the Cullens lately. Is there anything going on that I should know about?"

"No way!" I exclaimed, flustered at her question. Glancing at the clock, I realized Charlie would be home soon; it gave me the perfect excuse to run for it. "Hey, Jessica, I need to start dinner. Good luck with Mike, okay?"

"Mmhm. See you tomorrow, Bella."

I hung up the phone, trying to ignore the promise of interrogation in her voice. Damn it, so that's why she'd been looking at me like that. I'd thought I was being subtle… Well, maybe not subtle, but at least not obvious. I'd barely been paying attention to Edward, save for the occasional glance here and there. I was horrible at hiding my expressions; perhaps I'd reacted without thinking, and that's what had given me away. I scowled, chopping up some left over chicken and tossing it into a pan with vegetables.

The rest of the evening was spent on making burritos, watching a car race on television with Charlie and falling asleep while reading Of Mice and Men. I woke up late the next morning with a drool-stained book, the faint trace of ink on my cheek and Erin knocking on the door. I didn't bother with my hair, my usual concealer make-up or even putting on new clothes; I'd fallen asleep in yesterday's clothes, and those would have to be good enough. Zooming downstairs, I grabbed as much of my stuff as I could and rushed out to Erin's car.

"Sleeping Beauty awakens!" he laughed as I rushed past him, running a hand through my curly mess of a mane and trying to scrub the ink off my face. "I was going to break the door down in a minute there."

"Uhg. I don't know what's wrong with me, I was reading our new English book and just passed out."

"That book does have the tendency to drain the joy right out of your soul," Erin said. "Of course, Jessica also has the same tendency. Did she get a hold of you last night, by the way?"

"What, she called you too?"

He drummed his fingers on the wheel, glancing at me nervously. "She was trying to convince me to go to the dance. She was trying to set me up with Stacy."

"Ah," I replied, thinking of the geeky girl who sat with Tyler's table. "And?"

"… And what?"

I gave him the same look my mother gave me when I was younger; it always made me cower, and it was about time I learned to wield the same weapon. "And are you going?"

Erin shrunk into his seat. "I already have a date," he muttered.

"Really?" I stared at him, wondering why he hadn't said anything. "Who is she?"

"He," Erin seemed to get even smaller. "Ben Colton."

I stared at him, my sleep-addled brain trying to turn the mental gears. "Oh… Ohhh," I grinned wickedly as I connected the dots. "Mike's friend from the football team?" I asked. "You are going to break SO many hearts, Erin York. He's a catch."

Peeking over at me, Erin looked a little less wilted as we pulled into the school parking lot. "You're… not freaked out?"

I made a noise of exasperation, getting out of the car and glaring at the sky as it began to rain. "Erin, trust me. If I was going to be freaked out about something, that's pretty low on the list. My aunt is a lesbian, that's why she moved to New Mexico… to get away from my mom's family."

"You won't tell anyone?" he asked as we stopped outside the English building. "It's just… people talk. You know how Forks can get."

"Cross my heart and hope to d--"

He held up his hands. "I appreciate the sentiment, but let's not tempt fate, okay?"

I grinned, giving him a hug and heading into class. I glanced at the Cullen's Volvo as it pulled up in the parking lot before shutting the classroom door behind me. It seemed like everyone in Forks had some sort of secret, some sort of mystery behind them…

… One down, five more to go.


	8. Chapter Seven

CHAPTER SEVEN

Mike wasn't in English class, strangely enough, which made me wonder what exactly went on between him and Jessica the night before. Erin was unusually quiet, and I wondered if he regretted telling me about his secret. I hoped that wasn't the case, but either way, he slowly became talkative again near the end of class and was his chatty self by the time he walked me to Government. Jessica was suspiciously absent from Spanish, and neither she nor Mike were at the lunch table by the time I got to the cafeteria.

"I wonder where Mike and Jessica made off to," I said as I came back with my lunch. There were hardly any people at the table; the only ones there besides me were Erin, Angela, Lauren and one of her little cronies. "It's not like them to not even show up."

"And how would you know?" Lauren snipped from the other side of the table.

"Oh, I tend to be more observant than most," I replied, sick to death of that girl's cattiness. I plastered a bright, cheerful smile on my face. "No offense or anything."

Lauren flipped her hair, turning to whisper something to her friend. The two picked up their stuff and went over to sit with Tyler and the others, and I rolled my eyes as the beginnings of a new round of gossip started up... Probably involving my being mean to the poor, victimized popular girl. Angela gave me a proud look, and I tried to feel good about standing up for myself even though I wanted to panic and go hide under my bed. Luckily for me, the bell rang soon enough and I was able to run off to Biology with Angela in tow.

Of course, it was trading one set of problems for another. I ignored Edward like always, focusing instead on the fact that Mike had magically returned from wherever he'd been, all cheer and smiles. He bounced over to my side of the table as soon as I walked in the door, practically bursting at the seams with enthusiasm.

"Hey, Bella! What did I miss in English?"

I grinned. "Depends on where you were."

He glanced left, then right, as if someone might be sneaking up to listen in; sadly enough, were I not sitting next to the single most attractive and intimidating boy in all of Forks, they probably would have been. "Jessica and I were off… celebrating," he whispered. "She asked me out."

"Ahhh… Well, I suppose true love is a good enough excuse to give you the assignment," I said, digging around in my bag and handing him a copy of the worksheet I'd picked up for him. "I thought you'd show up eventually."

"Thank you, ma'am!" he grinned. "I heard you weren't going to the dance, though. Gotta say I'm disappointed."

I sighed, slightly disconcerted at the fact that Jessica might have been discussing me while she and Mike did lords knew what. "Yeah, I'm heading up to Seattle that day. With Angela, unless she gets asked out, in which case I'll be hitchhiking my way there."

Mike stared at me. "You? Hitchhike?" he asked with an incredulous tone, and I tried not to laugh as I practically saw all the various horrible scenarios I could get into going through his head. "But…"

But then the teacher called the class to order, and Mike was forced to slink back off to his desk, looking just as disturbed about my hitchhiking as I felt about his make-out session with my best friend. A small chuckle came from next to me, and I glanced at Edward, my heart immediately thumping a bit faster than normal.

"It's a bit cruel to tease him, isn't it?" Edward mused quietly, giving me a side-long look.

I tried to summon the nerve I had during lunch, focusing all my panic into as biting a manner as possible. "You're not one to talk."

He looked at me fully, his expression infuriatingly neutral. "You think I'm cruel?"

"I think you've not talked to me for weeks, and you better not start unless you're going to reply to what I wrote."

Edward's eyes narrowed. "Fine."

I opened my textbook and looked away. "Fine."

The boy was silent for nearly ten minutes, then turned to me when the teacher left to go make copies of the worksheet, speaking in the quietest possible voice. "What does it matter to you, anyway? You're alive, shouldn't that be enough?"

"I'm nosey," I replied, trying to sound as bored as possible. Pretending I didn't care covered up the sheer giddiness that he was talking to me again. "That and you traveled at least twenty feet in about a second. I think I have the right to be curious."

"You're mental."

"Being crazy isn't the same as being wrong."

A low growl came from his throat. The teacher came back, and the conversation ended there. He said nothing else, and was the first out the door when the class ended. I spent the rest of the school day assuring Mike I wasn't going to hitchhike to Seattle as we tossed a basketball back and forth during the break. Erin was quiet on the way home, and I was grateful that Charlie was at work. It gave me time to think out loud without people listening in and thinking I had gone completely over the edge.

"Okay, so he saved my life," I said to the air, dumping my stuff by the door and storming into the living room. "Good for him. I can let all this go now, it doesn't matter how he did it or why he did it. I'm alive. That's all that matters."

But I couldn't let it go. People aren't supposed to be able to do stuff like that, it wasn't natural. That was the sort of thing that would be found in comic books or movies, not in real life… or was it? I shook my head, pacing the length of the living room as I tried to think of all the rational reasons possible to explain what I'd seen.

"He was closer than I thought, I just thought he was farther away. He didn't push me out of the way, I actually ran and I don't remember. Someone else saved me and I assume it was him because I saw him. Edward wasn't really there at all… Damn it, this is stupid," I stopped, flopping down on the sofa. "If I'd run for it, if it hadn't been him or if he'd been closer, then he wouldn't be acting like such an ass."

"Who's acting like a what?"

I nearly jumped out of my skin at my father's voice. Luckily, he was just coming in the door and likely hadn't heard much. "Uhm… Some dude on TV was being… rude," I said lamely, waving my hand at the blank television screen. "So I decided to get started on dinner."

Charlie's eyes lit up; the food distraction worked every time. "So, what have you been up to today?"

I quickly made my way into the kitchen and started baking a casserole. "Oh, not much," I said. Just yelling at myself. "I wanted to ask you if it's okay for Angela to drive me up to Seattle the week after next."

"Isn't that homecoming week? Jessica's mother was talking about it when she dropped of lunch for the secretary."

My first reaction was to bang my head on the kitchen counter. Instead, I gave my dad a patient smile. "Yes, it is, but I'm not going to the homecoming dance. Flashing lights and I don't get along too well."

His face fell a bit. "Oh… that's right. I always seem to forget."

"It's okay, dad," I lied. Constant reminders of things I couldn't do didn't really make good conversation, unwittingly given or not. I tried to focus on dinner, but I could feel 'that subject' worm its way into the room, the tension in the air steadily increasing.

"Isabella… I think we need to talk," Charlie finally said, affirming the feeling of dread that had been growing in the back of my skull. "I think that maybe it's time we talked about what happened. About your health."

"I've been taking my medication. Erin's giving me a ride to school. Things are going fine, there's nothing to talk about."

Charlie opened his mouth to reply, then shut it again. "I understand it's hard to talk about. I can wait. But I need to say this, and I hope that you can believe me. If I'd have known that your mother's condition was genetic… If I'd known it could have been passed down… I would have told you. I would never have put you in that sort of danger."

I set down the oven mitts, setting the egg timer for another half an hour and avoiding his gaze. "You didn't. Mom did."

My father fell silent, and I could sense that the discussion-- for now-- was over. While the casserole finished baking, I escaped up to my room with the excuse of needing to shower. I didn't want to be there in the room with Charlie while my emotions began to boil to the surface; I didn't want him to see me angry and mistakenly think I was mad at him. Grabbing my nightwear, I turned the shower on full blast and stepped into the scalding-hot water, letting it work away my tension like it always did.

It hurt inside to know that he blamed himself for what had happened to me. Had he been beating himself up over the crash all these years? Yes, he had been the one to buy me the car for my birthday on one of his rare trips down there to see me dance, but it certainly hadn't been his fault that I'd gotten into the accident. My mother had done a very good job at hiding her illness from me, and I had done an even better job at ignoring the signs that something had been wrong with me. How many mornings had I woken up before then with arm spasms, with little pieces of time missing that I couldn't quite explain? Charlie had done nothing wrong, yet I didn't know what had gone on between my parents in the days following the accident. It made me sick to think that perhaps my aggressive mother had shoved the blame off on Charlie, who seemed all too willing to accept the burdens of others.

Perhaps it was my own fault for letting him believe such a thing. I'd barely spoken to him for three years. It was selfish on my part, and I felt a wave of guilt wash over me. If only I'd been able to see past my own misery, maybe I would have been able to see the spiral my mother had been falling down into. Maybe I would have been able to see my father's own pain. Could I have stopped it? Probably not. People couldn't be forced to change their mindset that easily. But maybe I could have stopped it from getting worse, and that wasn't a part of myself I was ready to confront.

Leaving the shower, I slipped into my clothes and wandered into my room. I flicked on the computer, going online partially to e-mail my mother like I'd promised and partially to distract myself. Once I fought back the pop-up ads, I logged into my e-mail and typed out a quick reply to a message my mother had sent me-- apparently she was worried about me going out on Halloween. I wondered exactly what she expected to happen to me in Forks. Aside from ice storms and bad drivers nearly smushing me, I doubted that anything vile was lurking in the darkness here. Aside from her message and the usual junk, there was a letter from my therapist. I opened it and read over her usual short, to the point message.

_Dear Bella,_

_I'll be calling you sometime next week. I'm sorry I missed you last month; my husband is ill. It's understandable that you feel the need to protect your mother, but I'm sure she knows that you're not as happy as you make yourself out to be. Try some fish oil for the knee, it helps me with my arthritis. Don't feel bad asking for something you need-- we all need help sometimes. If you're worried about your medication, it might be wise to go to your doctor and talk to them. As for the boy in your class, trust your instincts. You know what's right. Be careful, though. Good luck with Charlie. If anyone can teach him to cook, it's you. Talk to you next week!_

_Sincerely,_

_Nora_

I considered replying, then decided to just wait until next week. Logging off my account, I read a few web comics before the egg timer went off downstairs. I was reluctant to go back and face Charlie again, but with any luck at all, he'd given up on talking about things for now. I sighed and shut the computer down, wishing I could escape for a little bit longer. I headed down to the kitchen, praying that dinner would be just another quiet meal in front of the wonderful, distracting television. One could only hope.

* * * * *

Dinner was thankfully uneventful, and my dreams that night were devoid of guest appearances from Edward. Sleep came late due to studying for a Government test I was almost certain I was going to fail, and the monsoon occurring outside certainly didn't help; it was raining the hardest it had rained in weeks and showed no signs of stopping by the time I fell asleep at two o' clock in the morning. When I woke up, however, I noticed two things-- I was running late once again, and it was light outside.

Sun!

I squealed, bouncing across the room and trying not to trip over my legs as I peeked out my window. Sure enough, the sky was a soft blue with only the barest hint of frail, wispy clouds overhead and in the distance. I felt my spirits soar, and it took me less time to get ready to go than normal as the fantastic weather lent to me a good dose of joyful energy. Even though I'd woken up late, I was still out the door before Erin got there, sitting on the steps and soaking up the pale, golden rays of sunshine. Our car ride to school seemed more animated and cheerful, and as we pulled into the parking lot and got out, everyone seemed to be friendlier.

By the time Geometry class arrived, however, the thin clouds had expanded and once more taken over the sky. The usual solemnity fell over the student body, the playful energy from early all but vanishing as the skies parted and the rain returned in full force. I blamed the turn of weather for the terrible grade I received on a pop quiz on volume and mass; Angela didn't do much better, and we sulked off to our separate classes without our usual friendly interactions. Spanish class wasn't much better, though Jessica seemed pleasant enough as we headed to lunch.

"Do you think I should let Mike take me up to Olympia with him this week? I guess he wants to go to this one restaurant. I don't know if it's too soon…"

I ran a hand through my hair, rubbing at my neck nervously as we neared the lunch room and I fought back my agoraphobia. "I'm not sure, Jessica. I've never dated, so I wouldn't know."

Her jaw dropped. "You never had a boyfriend? Or anything?"

I blushed. "I've never really had the time," I muttered. It was the truth, really. I'd been too busy going to physical therapy and trying to catch up on missed school work that I'd been forced to forgo the entire idea of dating.

"I don't see how you've survived. Poor thing."

Apparently I had missed some cosmic memo; I wasn't aware that dating was a requirement for living. I chose to ignore the pitying look on Jessica's face as I snagged my lunch and trudged back to the table. Luckily for me, Mike was so busy talking about his plans for the beach trip that Jessica was distracted and failed to question me further. All was going as usual until suddenly, right there, was Edward Cullen.

"I'm sorry to interrupt," he said with one of those dazzling smiles, "but could I borrow Bella for a moment?"

A silence fell over the table, and I tried to ignore the way Jessica stared at me with bugged out eyes as I stood up and followed the boy to an empty table. We sat down and I folded my hands in my lap, not meeting his gaze. My heart was already pounding quick enough, I didn't need to pass out from looking into those gorgeous, topaz eyes. Edward didn't say anything for a moment, then chuckled quietly.

"You're probably confused," Edward murmured. "I read your letter."

I fought back the butterflies in my stomach and summoned up a healthy dose of righteous irritation. "That was a month ago."

"I know. I wanted to apologize to you, Bella. I'm sorry for acting the way I have… I just didn't want to hurt you."

Finally, I managed to glare at him. "How the hell could you hurt me? Like ignoring me made me feel better?"

He smiled slightly, and my anger faltered. "It was for your own good. We shouldn't be friends... I'm not the best person to keep company with, you see."

My throat tightened a bit. "So I've heard. Then why bother talking to me now?" I asked, my voice too close to a squeak for my comfort.

"You remind me of someone I knew once," he added, looking out the nearby window as his smile faded. "I don't want to stay away from you. It pains me to try."

I turned my attention to the zipper on my jacket, fiddling with it. "Who is it? The person I remind you of, I mean."

Edward watched me a moment, then shook his head. "I've never been good with people. Especially when it involves talking about my past. Maybe this is a mistake… Maybe we'd be better off just forgetting about things. Of course, that's not what you want, is it?"

"I wish we could be friends," I replied quietly. "It would be nice to get to know you."

"And if it turns out to be not so nice after all?"

Something in the tone of his voice made the voice in the back of head shiver. I glanced up, finding nothing but sincerity in his eyes. "I'll take my chances."

"In that case," Edward continued, "I want to make things up to you. Would you like a ride to Seattle the night of the dance?"

"Oh, well…" I stammered. My heart nearly fluttered right out of my chest, and I was grateful when the bell rang; gathering up my things gave me a moment to catch the breath that had suddenly left me. The idea of being alone with such a gorgeous man was unbearably amazing. "Uhm, Angela was giving me a ride that day. You know, unless she found a date or something. It's a very kind offer…"

He smiled brightly, and my knees quivered. "Keep it in mind, just in case. I better let you go back to your friends… your guard dog looks ready to implode."

A quick glance at Mike confirmed that the jock was about ready to come over and rescue me from Edward. "I will most definitely keep it in mind," I squeaked. "See you in biology!"

I scurried off before he could reply, though I thought I could hear his quiet laughter as I nearly stumbled over an empty milk carton in my attempt to escape. Everyone stared at me as I approached, and although Angela said nothing, her eyes were wide and curious as we headed to Biology. Mike kept demanding to know what Edward had wanted with me; I lied and said it was about homework. He seemed to accept my answer, but he kept casting me suspicious glances on our way to class. Halfway to the room, a shorter, dark-haired boy with glasses jogged up and stopped Angela, who urged us to go on without her.

Mike wiggled his eyebrows as we left. "Seems like everyone is getting asked out today," he said, and I sighed at the hidden implications of that statement.

"Not everyone," I grumbled. Part of me was thankful that Edward was not in biology when we got there, lest my face gave away the wild thoughts running through my head.

Angela came in a few minutes later, practically glowing. "Bella," she whispered, rushing over and trying not to attract too much attention as she stole Edward's empty seat and practically bubbled. "Guess what?"

"You got asked to the dance?" I guessed, mentally cursing Edward for jinxing me.

She nodded vigorously, then looked slightly ashamed. "Oh, but our plans…"

"Don't worry about it. I have a back-up plan."

This seemed to put her mind at peace, and she bounced off as the teacher came in and started class. I doodled in my notebook as he began to lecture, zoning out as usual. It was only when there were a few, complaining groans around the room that I looked up… and nearly dropped. The teacher stood there with a lancet and a bloody sheet of paper.

"So, if you'll pass out the kits, Mike…" the teacher said, handing Mike a bunch of small boxes.

I raised my hand a bit, feeling faint. "Uhm…" I raised my hand a bit higher when the teacher ignored me, wanting to shrink into a corner as a few eyes turned to me. "Excuse me?"

The teacher finally noticed me… along with the entire class. "Yes, Miss Swanson?"

"I… Uhm, could I go to the… er, nurse? Please? I already know my blood type, and… uhm…"

Mike came to my rescue. "I'll take her," he offered. "She's got a thing about blood."

"Oh! Why didn't she just say so?"

If I hadn't felt like I was going to pass out, I'd have walked over there and thrown up on the teacher out of spite. I muttered to myself as Mike helped guide me out the door and towards the office. My breath was coming too quick, and I suddenly had to sit down as my vision darkened. My hands twitched a bit; I put my head in my hands and counted to myself. If I got too worked up, I could have a seizure. Mike was rubbing my shoulders, and I finally convinced myself to stop hyperventilating as I relaxed. I sighed, the feeling fading into plain old nausea. I stood up…

…And woke up in the nurse's office with three faces peering anxiously at me.

The first face was the nurse. "She's awake. Isabella, are you okay, hun?"

"Mm, yeah," I mumbled. "Tired."

"I'll go call your father and have him get you. Mike, dear, shouldn't you back to class?"

"But--"

A smooth, calm voice interrupted. "I'll stay with her. I was leaving for an appointment anyhow, so I won't get in trouble for missing class."

After a minute, I was left alone with the last face… and through my grogginess, I finally identified that handsome, haunting face as Edward Cullen. I struggled to sit up, embarrassment rushing through me at being incapacitated in front of him. Finally, I made it to a sitting position, and I realized I was under a blanket and laying on the floor. I heard the nurse on the phone, mentioning to bring me a fresh change of clothes. Tears of humiliation stung my eyes.

"Are you okay?" Edward asked.

"If I was, I wouldn't be here," I snapped.

He eyed me. "You never mentioned that you had epilepsy."

"It's not like I advertise it. Did… What happened? You weren't in Biology class."

Edward focused on his hands suddenly. "I was in my car listening to music. Mike came along with you in tow… Then you sat down, and when you stood up again you dropped like a rock. Mike caught you but you were having a seizure. I came up and stayed with you while he got the nurse, but you stopped after a moment, so I picked you up and brought you into the office."

"Do you think he'll tell anyone?"

"Why ask me?" he glanced up, brows furrowed.

"Because you're the mind-reader," I said dryly. His face went blank, and I wondered exactly what I said to cause that reaction. "Angela got asked out to the dance today. I guess I have to take you up on your offer."

"I see." He paused, then stood up and grabbed his things in a single movement, the picture of grace. "I better get going. Feel better soon, Bella."

I nodded. Edward gave me that wonderful smile and left, and it was like the sun had left the sky. I wrapped my arms around myself and shivered, waiting for Charlie to get there. It wasn't more than five minutes before he arrived, handing me a bag of clothes and politely avoiding talking and eye contact. I took the bag and managed to stand up on my own, wobbling off towards the nearby bathroom. Locking the door, I rested my forehead on the door and let a few tears slide down my cheeks.

Why me? Why couldn't I just have been a normal kid? Anger rushed through my muscles, and I punched the wall before I could really think about it. My knuckles immediately bled, and shame followed on the heels of the anger. What right did I have to be complaining? It could always be worse… It was stupid to waste time being upset. I sniffled and wiped my eyes, stripping off my clothes and putting on the unsoiled ones my father had brought. I shoved the others into the bad and tied it shut, then draped my jacket over my arm and the bag, hoping to hide my scratched hand. I ducked my head as I left the bathroom, silently making my way towards the car; luckily there was no one watching, and the rain had graciously halted long enough so that I wasn't forced to wear my jacket and expose my self-caused injury.

The ride home was a quiet one. It wasn't until we pulled into the driveway that Charlie spoke.

"You need to go to the doctor and make sure your medication is working," he said, turning off the car and toying with the keychain. "I know you don't want to talk about it, so I won't, but I want you to get yourself checked out. Soon."

I wasn't going to bother fighting it, especially when he was using his work-voice. Police officers could be scarily convincing. "I'll call them tomorrow."

He got out of the car and I followed suit, the conversation over. I tossed my clothes into the washer once I was inside, then slunk upstairs to take a shower. The phone rang as I finished my shower and headed towards my room; it was my therapist, and I breathed a sigh of relief as I went downstairs, grabbed the cordless phone from my father and headed back up to my room for some privacy.

"Hello?"

"Hey there," Nora's friendly voice greeted me on the other end of the line. "How are you, Bella?"

"I don't know," I sighed, laying down on my bed. "So much has happened since you last e-mailed me…"

For an hour, we talked about everything that had happened. The thing with Tyler, my making a small group of friends, how I felt bad for having Erin drive me to school. I talked about the dance, how I was angry at myself for not being able to go and jealous of Jessica and the others. Finally, I mentioned Edward and my worries about his attitude, yet the fact I was attracted to him was undeniable.

"I remember being in love with the bad boys," Nora chuckled. "There's nothing wrong with liking him, but judging from what you've said before, you should still be careful if that's what your intuition tells you. Maybe you should just be cautious until you spend more time with him and his family, and let yourself trust him as things go along."

I bit my lip. "It's really not so bad. I think he's just not that social."

My therapist paused, then made a noncommittal noise. "Your own social issues could be exaggerating what's really going on, true. I think you should really learn to listen to yourself. You're a strong, smart person, Bella. Why don't you try writing up some positive affirmations and read over them every day?"

"Okay," I toyed with my medical bracelet. "I'll keep what you said in mind."

"And Bella? Don't be worried over needing to take some time for yourself. It's not a bad thing to bend the rules every now and then. Get some rest."

"I will. Thanks, Nora."

"No problem. Talk to you next month."

We hung up, and I snuggled under the covers of my bed. It was as if Nora's suggestion had summoned some god of sleep into my room; I was so tired that my eyes refused to open. I'd barely slept after me seizure, and it had all caught up to me. I sighed again, wrapping my arms around my pillow and pushing Nora's words from my mind. I would think about all of it tomorrow. Things would be better then…


	9. Chapter Eight

CHAPTER EIGHT

A ringing noise came from under my pillow. I snapped awake, looking to the clock… the alarm wasn't going off, yet the ringing persisted. I lifted my pillow and discovered the phone; I had apparently passed out with it in my hand. I fumbled around with the buttons before finally hitting the right one.

"Hi?" I muttered, rubbing my eyes. "Who is it?"

"Bella, you're finally awake!" Mike cheered. I glanced at the clock to recheck the time, and nearly screamed when I realized it was almost noon. Aside from my panic at being incredibly late, I suddenly wondered exactly how many times people had been trying to get hold of me. "We've been calling you for hours."

Well, there was my answer. "I'm so sorry, I must have really passed out. Uhm, what's up?"

"It's okay. After yesterday…" he hesitated. "Well, it's okay. I was wondering if you're feeling better. We've all skipped school and we're planning to head out to La Push today. Do you want to go?"

"Weren't you going to go on Halloween?"

"Have you even looked outside yet?"

Stumbling out of bed, I was about to protest until I saw the bright, glorious, wonderful sunlight that poured itself across the area. There were no clouds in sight and, unlike the pale sky the day before, today's sky was a brilliant, vivid blue. I shuffled my feet a bit, testing them and taking a moment to gauge my condition. I was a bit tired, but I felt better than I had and my usual spasms were absent. At first, I considered telling him no-- I should go to school instead of the beach. But…

"Wow," I replied. Nora's words danced around in the back of my mind, and while I knew she likely didn't intend to suggest that I should skip school and go celebrate the sun with a pack of people, I figured she'd be pleased enough that I was taking a break and attempting to overcome my fear of people. "Sure, I'll go. When are you leaving?"

"In about half an hour. I'll swing by and pick you up, if that's good with you."

"That works. I'll see you in a bit."

He practically squealed before he left, and I set the phone down as I pondered what I'd need. Opening the rusty window, I breathed in the fresh air and squealed myself at the unnaturally warm temperature. I shut the window again and went to my dresser, getting a light knit, blue turtleneck sweater and jeans. Since I couldn't swim, I didn't bother with anything else except for my sandals, sunglasses and a bottle of sunscreen. I grabbed my wallet, penned a quick note to my father out of habit-- telling who I was with, where we were going and apologizing very much for skipping school-- and headed out the door. Mike pulled up in a giant SUV, and I hopped into the passenger side, trying not to fall as I hoisted myself up into the monster of a car.

"This is going to be so great," Mike said as he zoomed down the street. "I'm glad you can come with us. I was kinda worried."

"Listen, about yesterday…"

He smiled sheepishly. "Erin already filled me in. I won't tell anyone, I promise. Although… Why don't you tell people? It's not like we'll think less of you or anything."

I kept my eyes out the window and focused on the sky. "It's just... It's my own problem. It's not like it's that bad, anyhow. There's no need to make everyone worry about me when they don't need to."

Mike made the same noise my therapist had made the night before, but he didn't say anything else about it as we pulled up to the parking lot of his father's store. "Stop number one. We just need to get everyone figured out, then we'll head out to La Push."

There were at least fifteen people there already. I was tempted to stay in the car and hide, but I saw Jessica and Angela not too far away from our car, and I followed Mike over to say hello. I stopped when I was Lauren approach Jessica and I decided to stay by the car after all, especially when the girl threw a sneer in my general direction. I didn't want a confrontation. Tyler arrived in his new car just then, and the group of people began to split up between the SUV and the minivan. Angela saw me and waved. I waved back, trying to keep my amusement in check when both she and Jessica headed my way as everyone decided who to go with; Lauren looked livid.

We piled into Mike's car, with Mike and Jessica smushed side by side in the front seat and Angela squeezed into the window seat. I sat in the middle row of seats with Erin, who had showed up last-minute with Ben Colton at his side, the two looking more than little anxious. Ben had brought his brother, Robert, and two girls who looked very cozy with one another. The football player took the seat next to Erin, and his brother and the two girls hopped into the back of the car. After we'd all settled into our spots and managed to get our seatbelts on, we headed out, following Tyler's van out of town.

Everyone rolled the windows down to let in the fresh air, and I felt like I was in heaven. I stayed quiet while the others talked excitedly about what they wanted to do when they got there, content to watch the scenery. The thing about La Push was that the beach was actually not much of a beach. There was a forest that eventually turned into rocks and driftwood, and only a few yards of actual sand between that and the ocean. I hated the ocean with a passion, and the idea of not having much distance between it and me wasn't very comforting. Still, I found myself relaxing as the others got hyper; their giddiness was contagious. Someone popped in a CD and turned the music up after a few minutes, and I couldn't help but giggle when Mike began to yodel out the words. Somehow we all ended up singing along with the music, and the half hour that it took to get to La Push passed by quicker than I would have thought. It was good to laugh again.

When we got to the beach, Tyler and his group… who drove like maniacs the entire way there, apparently… were already setting up their 'camp'. We unloaded from the SUV and walked down to join them. Most of the people ran off to go swimming, and the few of us who didn't stayed behind to help Mike gather driftwood. In the end, it was just Mike and I; everyone else had gotten persuaded to take a hike over to the tide pools. Mike set the wood up just so, then looked over at me and grinned.

"Watch this," he said, then lit the fire.

I stared in awe as the flames leaping up from the wood turned green. "Wow. How did you do that?"

"The salt in the ocean water makes the fire turn colors," Mike replied, looking proud of himself. "I learned that in Chemistry."

Jessica suddenly ran up in her swimsuit, and I snickered as Mike nearly dropped his lighter. "Hey you two, do you want to come swimming with us? It's awesome out there."

I shook my head. "I can't swim. I'll stay here and guard the fire. You know, keep it from burning the forest down," I added, waving my hand to the thick stand of trees. Knowing my luck, it would burn down anyhow just to spite me. "You guys go."

Mike winked at me and mouthed a silent 'thank you' as he jogged off after Jessica, obviously happy to be relieved of fire duty. I brought my knees up to my chest and wrapped my arms around them, watching the flickering flames and letting my mind wander. I closed my eyes as the sun warmed my back, and for a moment I wished that Edward was there. Nora said to learn more about him… It'd be easier to do that if I could actually be around him without losing my voice. I still wanted answers, and I wasn't going to get them by being a squeaky little coward. Maybe I would take him up on his offer to drive me to Seattle, after all. If I got him alone, maybe I could get him to actually talk…

A noise came from the woods behind me, snapping me out of my thoughts. I looked towards the sound, but saw nothing. The noise came again and I stood up, taking a step closer to the trees. Maybe it was just a wild animal or something. Suddenly, a pinecone flew from the shadows and bounced off my head; I was about to run for it when an oddly familiar voice came from behind a tree.

"Well, well. If it's not Miss Trip and Fall, returned from exile."

I stared at the mischievous face that peeked out at me, then grabbed the pinecone and hurled it back at the Native American boy. "Jacob Black, you little bastard. I thought you were a bear."

He ran up and nearly tackled me. "It's actually you! I didn't believe it when I heard from my dad that you were coming back, but then Newton gave me a ring and said that you all were taking a trip down today, and when he mentioned you…" the younger male let me go from his deathgrip and stepped back to look at me. "It's been ages. How do I look?"

It had been at least three years since I'd seen my friend, and I gave him an appraising look. He was younger than me by two years but he looked much older than fifteen, even though he was still shorter than me by about three inches. His skin was several shades darker than mine and absolutely flawless, and he'd let his thick, black hair grow out to his shoulders. Although I saw him as nothing more than a brother, I had to admit that he was handsome.

"You look good, Jake," I grinned. "I'm assuming it's not just coincidence you're here, then?"

Jake flopped next to me on the sand as I went and sat by the fire again. "Nope. Mike and his friends come down here all the time when the weather is good, and they always get drinks from our store. His cousin married Rebecca," he said, referring to his older sister. "If you remember her."

I thought back to the fishing trips our families had gone on together and nodded. "She's not much older than us. They must have really been in love."

"Head over heels," Jacob replied. He looked at me oddly for a moment, then poked at the sand with a stick. "Can you still fish barehanded, like I taught you?"

"I haven't fished in years. Not since… Well, since the last time I saw you."

We talked up a storm for a time-- about how our fathers were, what we'd been up to and how we'd missed one another. A few of the other kids from the reservation came down with drinks as Mike and the rest came back from swimming and hiking; they all mingled together and began to organize a game of volleyball. Mike waved to us and went with Jessica and Tyler up to the store Jacob's father owned to get more drinks and foodstuffs, while Erin, Angela and a couple others came to sit near the fire with us.

"Hi, Jacob," Lauren said as she sauntered up. I didn't miss the glance she gave the both of us. "Good to see you again."

"Sure," Jacob replied, giving her a smile that I knew didn't mean a thing. Apparently, Lauren was not exactly a popular person. "Bella, do you want to go for a walk? We can catch up on old times some more."

Lauren butted in to the conversation. "You two know one another?"

"Jake is an old friend," I stood up and brushed the sand off my jeans. "Our fathers have been friends for forever."

"I taught her how to fish barehanded," he added with pride, hopping up and heading off. "Come on, Bells. We can go to the tide pools."

We left as the others began to come back, heading out towards the rocky cliffs near the water; I was grateful for the peace and quiet. Although I hated the ocean, being with Jacob made it somewhat less of a worry, especially since he talked the entire way to the tide pools. I distracted myself from the crashing waves with his cheerfully told stories about fishing trips past, adding in my own commentary about some of the events… specifically, the last trip we were together, when our boat tipped and dumped me out into the shallow water.

"You totally would have drowned had it not been for me," Jacob said, striking a superhero-like pose.

I snickered. "It was less than five feet of water. I could have just stood up."

He deflated slightly. "But you have to admit, I am heroic."

"Yes. You were very brave, fighting off those evil trout."

Jacob helped pull me up the rocks to where the tide pools were; we flopped next to one of the larger ones and peered at the critters swimming around in the nature-made aquarium. We fell silent for a bit, both of us lost in our own thoughts. I reached out and carefully touched one of the bright orange starfish in the water, so many childhood memories coming back to me.

"Are you happy to be back?"

"I guess," I pulled my hand back from the water and dried it n my jeans. "I mean… I miss Phoenix. I wish I could be there, most days, but I have friends here and aside from almost getting crunched by Tyler's old van…"

His dark brown eyes widened to the size of dinner plates. "That sounds like a story, right there."

"It was back in September, when we got the freezing rain," I started, knowing how much of a sucker Jacob was for a story. "My friend Erin drove me to school like normal, but my medical bracelet came loose in the car, so I went back for it. Then this van comes out of nowhere and plows right towards me. I would have been squished for sure, but…" I hesitated. "Well. There was this boy, Edward Cullen, and he somehow managed to pull me out of the way. Lucky me, I guess."

The expression that came over Jacob's face when I mentioned Edward was unlike any expression I'd seen. "Cullen?"

"Yeah. His father was the doctor that treated me that day. What, you know him?"

"No, no," he said hastily. "Never mind, it's not important."

"Jacob."

He stared at me a moment, then looked towards the ocean. "The Cullens aren't allowed here. We're not supposed to talk about it, though. My father will get mad if I tell you."

I used the same look on Jacob that I had on Erin, crossing my arms and summoning as much irritation as possible to my tone of voice. "You know, everyone has been shifty about the Cullens since the day I got here. Now, I'm going to Seattle with him in a week, and if there's something I should know that you're hiding from me, I swear I'll--"

"Okay, I'll tell you," Jacob said quickly, waving his hands. "But you can't tell our dads that I told you. They've already been in arguments over it before, and if my dad knew you're making friends with a Cullen…" he shivered as some memory, then took a breath and sighed. "A lot of people on the reservation act like they've forgotten about it, or that they don't believe it, but… The Quileute tribe is a superstitious one. There's this tale we have, kept alive by the elders like my dad. It's about the cold ones."

A chill passed over my body. "The cold ones?"

Jacob caught on to my sudden unease, and apparently decided to make this as creepy of an experience as possible. "The cold ones," he whispered, mischief in his eyes as he spoke, "came here hundreds of years ago. They preyed upon the animals and our people, who could shape-shift into wolves, saw them as enemies. The cold ones entered an agreement with our elders that they would stay off our land, since no one could tell if it was an animal or a human that was being hunted until it was too late, in exchange for not telling outsiders about their existence. They say some of our people carry the knowledge of shape-shifting to this day, so the cold ones are still forbidden from entering the reservation."

I kept my tone skeptical, yet I could feel my heart beat faster. "So the Cullens are related to these cold ones."

"Nope. They are the same ones."

"Jacob," I said slowly, rubbing the chill from my arms and trying to sort out the piece that just fell onto the puzzle. "What exactly _are_ the cold ones?"

He gave me a small, devious smile. "I believe they're what normal folk call vampires."

The new piece fell into place. The way they looked, the way they acted, how Edward had saved my life… So many things suddenly made sense. I stared at Jacob, my mind spinning in circles as the logical half of my brain tried to deal with this information. Shape-shifters? Vampires? That was the stuff of movies. It wasn't supposed to be real. But there was something in Jacob's eyes as he looked at me, something that told me that as much as he wanted to pass it off as a tall tale, he believed it. And if he believed it… It made it seem that much more possible.

"You have goosebumps," he grinned.

"You're a good storyteller."

"Not as good as my father, he's the one who told it to me…" Jacob said, his smile fading. "Do you believe it? The story?"

I raised an eyebrow at him. "Should I?"

Jacob was about to reply when a head suddenly popped up over the rocks. I'm not sure who screamed louder-- me, or him.

"Whoa," Mike said, looking startled at our extreme reaction. He glanced between us both, obviously rethinking our sanity. "Uh, I was just coming over to let you guys know that we're cooking some food down there. Are you guys okay up here?"

"Jacob was just telling me some ghost stories," I replied, putting a hand on my chest and giggling nervously. "We'll be right down, Mike. Thanks."

Giving Jacob a baleful look, Mike's head sunk back down among the rocks and vanished. Muttering to himself, Jacob stood up, helping me to my feet and making sure I didn't fall as we both descended down the rocks and back towards the beach. We didn't speak the entire way down, but once we got there, he held my hands in his and looked into my eyes.

"I've really missed you, Bells. I'm glad you're back. Promise me you'll be careful from now on, though."

I smiled slightly. "Why does everyone keep saying that?"

"You're like my sister. And if you're anything like me and the rest of my family, you're an absolute magnet for trouble," he grinned. A loud rumbling noise came from his stomach, and he glanced towards the campfire in the distance. "I bet I can eat more hotdogs than you."

"You're on."

Jacob took off towards the other, dragging me along with him through the sand. We laughed as we ran together, like old times… Yet even as we sat together among the group next to the fire, stuffing our faces as we all shared stories, I felt alone, an icy chill having settled in my bones. In the glowing red and gold of the fire I imagined I saw those amber eyes, watching me. I shivered, then glanced up; Jacob's gaze met mine, and the intensity behind the look was unnerving. We were alike, as he'd said-- and so I knew that, despite his laughter and cheerful way of going about life, there was something more behind it. In his heart, he was something other than he seemed… and I was slowly starting to wonder if perhaps that 'something' knew more about the world than I dared to imagine.

Truth is stranger than fiction, Mark Twain had once said. I was beginning to suspect, unfortunately for me, that the man was right.


	10. Chapter Nine

CHAPTER NINE

Charlie was waiting for me by the time I got home.

"I suppose I should be grateful that you have some sort of social life," he said as I walked in, sitting on the stairs. "Although I should be disappointed that you skipped school."

"I left you a note," I offered, trying to ignore the stern expression he was giving me. "Angela got my homework for Biology and Geometry, and Erin got my homework for me this morning in English class. I'm only missing my Government homework, and he usually just assigns reading for Fridays."

The police look faltered. "So you're caught up on your homework?"

I nodded. "I'm ahead in English and Biology."

After a moment, Charlie cracked a smile. "Did you have fun?"

"I didn't get eaten by seagulls, if that's what you mean. Jacob was there," I added. Now that I knew he wasn't going to skin me, I headed into the kitchen and began making Charlie dinner. "I guess he knows Mike from the other times they've been out to La Push. I stopped by their store on the way back-- Billy sends his regards and wants to know if you'll call him to go fishing sometime."

"I haven't spoken to Billy in a while," Charlie muttered wistfully. "Maybe I will give him a call. Can I help?"

I nearly bounced with joy as my father came in and helped me make cheeseburgers. Jacob had beaten me at eating hotdogs, considering I'd barely touched the one I'd been given. Charlie managed to not burn them, and we spent the rest of the night watching basketball together. It was a good distraction, and I stayed up long past Charlie in order to get my Geometry homework done. Somehow, I fell asleep on the sofa and woke up with Charlie's old quilt draped over me; I stretched, my shoulders stiff, and wandered into the kitchen to get breakfast.

It was Saturday, but I still called my doctor's office like I was supposed to have done the day before and left a message. I didn't want to even think about going to the doctor, but it was still something familiar and normal… a much better alternative to the other things I had lurking in the back of my mind. After making myself a slice of toast, I went back to the sofa and began to work on my English homework, a paper on Shakespeare. I chose to write about Lady MacBeth's soliloquy in Act I, Scene V, and how it tied in to Shakespeare's attitude toward women. I flipped to the scene, grabbed my pen and doodled absentmindedly in my notebook while I read over the text.

"_The raven himself is hoarse  
That croaks the fatal entrance of Duncan  
Under my battlements. Come, you spirits  
That tend on mortal thoughts, unsex me here…"_

I sighed, my eyes drawing back to the word 'mortal'. I closed the book and set it on the automan with my notebook, standing up and pacing like I had weeks before. Try as I might, Jacob's story wasn't leaving me alone, and my thoughts kept returning to it. Finally, I gave up and went upstairs, turning on my computer and waiting for it to load. I pulled up my search engine and bit my lip, my fingers hovering over the keyboard. I could still just turn the computer off and forget about it… couldn't I?

Shaking my head, I typed in the word 'vampire' and hit the search button. I was presented with over seventy million hits, and for a second I just stared at the screen. Where to start? Wikipedia, some wine company and a name generator made up the top three hits, and the rest seemed to be about various novels, movies or role-playing games; it didn't look very promising. I clicked on the Wikipedia site and read over it, growing more and more skeptical about any successful research as time went on. It was the same stuff I'd heard over and over before, for the most part-- some sort of dead person who had risen from the grave and was likely just a bunch of crap stemming from a lack of understanding of the process of decay and illnesses like the plague. The usual description was a bloated figure with a ruddy complexion, clad in a burial shroud and possessing long hair and fingernails; they could be killed by chopping off their heads, cutting out their heart and setting the heart on fire, stabbing the suspected vampire through the heart with a stake made of ash, hawthorn or oak wood, and various other complicated, gruesome rituals.

The most interesting part of what I did find was that most vampires were, in fact, women rather than men… which simply cast further suspicion upon the entire idea of vampires in general. I followed a few interesting links and read about the Babylonian myth of Lilitu, or Lillith, who seemed to be one of the first actual 'vampires' and fed on the blood of newborns. Then there were the vetalas, evil spirits from Hindu mythology who possessed corpses who were often sought as slaves by sorcerers and were capable of both killing children and guarding villages. A Roman legend talked about the strige, a blood-drinking creature in the shape of a bird, and a Greek one spoke of the fanged vrykolakas, which apparently applied to both vampire-like creatures and werewolves. Then there was an evil soul from Romanian mythology, and basically looked to be a 'witch' that feasted on the blood or energy of its victims. There were two types, the Strigoi Vii and the Strigoi Morti, the former being a living creature and the latter being an undead one. There was a related entity called the moroi, which seemed to be a phantom, a vampire, a werewolf, or a living child born from two vampires.

There were so many myths from so many different cultures that I couldn't focus on them all. I gave up on Wikipedia and surfed through various other sites, still finding nothing that matched the story Jacob told me nor anything that reminded me of the Cullens. There were plenty of decent sites, even a few about 'real vampires'… people who felt that they were vampires, even if they didn't fit the traditional view of them. Some called themselves 'sanguines', others called themselves 'psychic vampires'. It did seem related to the myths and legends, and I hated to admit that I felt myself getting more and more drawn into this world I never knew existed. It was intriguing and I knew that I would revisit it someday, but it wasn't what I was looking for and so I moved on.

I was about to just give up on the idea altogether in a fit of frustration, but I found one last word that caught my interest. The last link I followed led me to a creature called the dhampire. It was a role-playing website, but I copy-pasted the word into the search engine and found a couple sites-- Wikipedia again, and another site-- that offered up somewhat more legitimate information. Apparently, a dhampire was the offspring of a vampire and a mortal, and although the exact nature and description of them varied as much as any other myth, there were three ideas that immediately attracted my attention. They were sometimes described as being attractive and extremely pale, tall and thin, with dark smudges under their eyes; they possessed extraordinary strength and often became defenders, protecting people from harmful vampires despite the fact that they, too, drank blood.

I leaned back in my chair, staring out my window and towards the forest. I used my toe to click off the computer's power, not bothering to shut it down properly as I stood up and went towards the window. I leaned on the wall, watching the last bits of sunlight; the clouds were rolling in again. I wanted to do something, but it wasn't even ten o' clock in the morning and there was nowhere to go, regardless. Glancing at the woods, I went downstairs and grabbed my jacket, hugging it to my chest and I went across the street and stepped into the trees.

It had been too long since I'd actually taken a walk, and with my heavy, thick shoes, I knew I could brave the slightly muddy path I had found. I focused on the trees, with their rapidly turning leaves. There were reds, bright yellows, browns… I had to hand it to Forks, it was pretty in Autumn. Thanks to my outings with Charlie when I was younger, I could recognize most of the trees and a couple of the plants, although their exact names were lost in my blurred memory. The farther I ventured into the woods, the darker it got; the trees were so thick that when I barely noticed when it began to rain. It was only when I stopped to sit and rest on a fallen tree that I noticed the sudden mist that had moved in and settled among the trees.

Without the safety of the plastic, wood and cement confines of civilization, sitting in this fog-filled forest, it was easier to think. The canopy of branches and floor of moss, dirt and ferns was more of a comfort to me than any church my mother had dragged me to had been, and as I sat, breathing in the cold, crisp and earthy air, I felt my mind began to clear. Unfortunately, it was also within this forest, this timeless place that had seen more seasons than a good portion of the inhabitants that lived around it, that made it easier to believe everything that Jacob had said and the things that I had learned on my own.

Was it possible that the legends were true? Yes, it was possible. It wasn't probable, but that didn't remove it from the realm of possibility. The world wasn't completely explored, nor were all things in this world explained. Even if the stories were exaggerated, in all things there was a grain of truth… which meant that something like that could be out there. It meant that it was indeed possible that the Cullens could be vampires. Did I believe it? It was getting harder and harder not to believe that _something_ was going on, whether or not it had to do with some bloodsucking creature of the dark. And so far, to my dismay, it was the only theory I had that really worked.

I was suddenly angry at myself. How could I let myself believe such nonsense? My mother would pitch a fit if she knew the things I'd been reading about… Charlie probably would, too, even if he was more open-minded than most. If my own parents would freak out on me, then surely anyone else would have me carted off to the psych ward. Trying to get a second opinion was out of the question. All I had was my own iffy mind to try and solve this…

I wouldn't believe it until I had some sort of proof. I refused to confront Edward about it-- I would simply watch and wait. Eventually, something would come up. Until then, I would simply work under the idea that such a thing was one of many options, and take the proper precautions. Until I got proof, I would do nothing but carry on like normal. But even as I decided this, my mind wandered back to Amelia, the girl who'd died in Alaska. What if Edward had actually harmed her? I rubbed my temples, muttering curse-words to myself. No, he had saved my life. Regardless of who or what he really was, he was a good person.

"Damn it," I grumbled out loud as the rain became heavier, finally starting to trickle through the living roof above my head.

Standing, I stepped through the plants and back on to the path, taking note of the direction of my footprints and following them back. I could only see a few feet ahead of me in any direction thanks to the fog. I paused a moment, hearing a noise beyond the fog, then walked faster. I was sure that it was just my imagination, but the level of my panic increased the longer I walked; had I really gone so far into the forest? There were wild animals around Forks, and I'd heard about bears or mountain lions coming down from the mountains before… The rain grew heavier, but it at least cleared away the fog and I glanced around me, making sure that I was as alone as I'd thought. As the end of the trail and my home came into sight, I suddenly smelled something sweet; I looked over my shoulder, wondering what flower would be blooming this time of year.

There was nothing there but ferns and the odd blackberry vine. I blinked, wrapping my arms around myself and stepping out into the street. My panic faded as I walked across the pavement and reached my door, going inside and locking the door behind me. I closed my eyes and took a slow, deep breath before taking off my shoes and jacket, and heading into the living room to finish my English paper. Lady MacBeth seemed just a little less creepy than before.

* * * * *

Mike and Erin dropped by on Sunday to get help… or in Erin's case, give help… with various homework assignments. We managed to explain several English concepts to Mike, and Erin somehow got me to understand a few Geometry terms. Both of them helped me with Spanish, making flash cards out of yellow, orange and pink sticky notes. We ordered pizza and watched some animated show called Code Geass, and I decided that there actually were some decent shows on television.

When Monday rolled around, I had managed to get ahead in Geometry, but I was still miserably behind in Government and Spanish. Erin tried to help me while we drove to school, tossing out random words, but I knew I was going to flunk the Government quiz the teacher had planned for the day, unless I learned by some miracle the full names of the last twenty presidents in about an hour. I slunk to English and at least felt good about turning in my paper early. The rest of that class was spent staring out the window and doodling; I focused on one of the birch trees outside, the wispy, inked branches trailing across my page and turning into obscure symbols within the paper's margins.

The thought of seeing Edward today made my palms sweat. I worked my bottom lip between my front teeth, doodling a pair of flat black eyes peering from behind the tree. I wanted to see him-- I longed to look into those eyes again and perhaps, armed with this new information, see if I could find something about him that I'd not noticed before. I wanted to see his smile. It was stupid to be so eager to be around him, and yet I couldn't get him out of my head.

As lunch drew closer, my anxiety grew. The test in Government added to the stress, and by the time my fourth class released us to lunch, I was a walking ball of strung-out nerves. Jessica seemed to pick up on it, much like Angela had in Geometry class, and she invited me to go to Port Angeles for dress shopping wither her, Angela and Lauren; they were going to leave after school. I was about to refuse, but then we walked into the lunchroom, and my heart broke at the clear absence of any Cullens. Well, there went my day…

"Bella?" Jessica prompted from behind me in the lunch line.

"I'll ask my dad," I grumbled.

My answer seemed to appease Jessica, and I spent the rest of lunch pouting as she excitedly squealed about the dance and the department store. After lunch, I used Angela's cell phone to call my dad on our way to Biology class. He agreed to let me go with the others, and that was the end of that. I sighed, handing the phone back to Angela. My disappointment grew deeper as I saw the empty seat beside mine. I had held out hope that perhaps Edward would show up for Biology, but as the minutes ticked by, that hope faded away.

The rest of the school day was promptly tuned out. I was happy when the final bell rang; some distraction was better than none, even if said distraction involved clothes I'd never think of wearing and Lauren, who looked crabby as usual. We all threw our things into Jessica's trunk and piled into the white Taurus. It would take about an hour to get to Port Angeles, and we would spend a few hours scouring the department store and surrounding shops before getting dinner at a pizza place and heading home. It would be a simple, fun trip to take my mind off the Cullens and off stupid vampire stories.

… At least, that had been the plan.


End file.
